Wow! It's always so reassuring to know other families have the drama, too! Although it's sad, you guys have some good reads produced tonight.
Since we are speaking of in-laws, as I think you all know, I'm not married, but I have my own in-law story. I have the tag of the "DIL that never was". I dated this guy (Scott) 20 years ago, and I think we all thought I would be a part of the family at some point. His parents just adored me, and oftentimes would stand up for me above him, which of course he hated! Since I moved away from my family, they really became my family as I ventured into the "big city". I didn't/still don't have a relationship with my "sperm donor", and his dad really became my dad....until the day he died 1.5 years ago.
The DBF even tracked me down and called me after he got engaged asking me if he made the wrong choice, making reference to how much his parents still spoke of me so much and how he knew I would have been a better DIL to his mom in particular than his fiance. It tore my heart to hear him say that because I never stopped loving him. Of course, I told him to look within his heart, and he'll know for certain what the right thing is to do.
Knowing the strong hold his mom in particular had on him, I knew that for the sake of his marriage, I had to keep some distance with his parents. For me, that's been a huge sacrifice, but for the ex-DBF, I had to. From time-to-time, I would meet up with his parents, and we would exchange letters and cards. I always wanted more from them as they were just like my family, even when we had long spells of not seeing one another.
When Scott's mom passed away 6 years ago, it was the first time I had met Scott's wife. (He and I kept in touch from time-to-time through the years though.) Not knowing what to expect, since I was last GF he had before her, I was yet wasn't surprised she was very kind to me. She said something that I wasn't sure how to take, however, but it validated what I believed. She said that she had heard SOOO many stories about me and saw pictures that her DMIL shared with her.
I had horrible guilt for keeping a distance from the parents, but again, I knew it was the right thing to do. Because of that guilt, I swore to help take care of his dad after her passing and leave no regrets. His dad and I became much closer, and I did explain to him why I felt I couldn't get as close to him and his wife as I wanted to while his wife was still alive. He said he understood. Even less than two weeks before "dad" (as I called him) unexpectedly passed away, he told me again that he wishes it would have worked out with Scott and I, but even though it didn't, I was a daughter to him.
It's bizarre how IMO God often prepares us for someone's passing. I was left with many signs starting 5 months before he died up until less than a week before his death. After the first sign, I reached out to Scott to make sure he knew how to get ahold of me in the event something would happen to his dad so I could help...I didn't tell him that I really felt that his dad was going to pass away. The last time I spoke to dad on the phone, I hung up and my heart felt like it slammed up against a metal door. I thought maybe it was because I didn't say "Love You" before hanging. It was a very real feeling. Of course days later I learned it was the door shutting before he went to Heaven.
No regrets! I'm so thankful to say I have no regrets, and Scott and I are still keeping in touch, which is a bonus. We even discuss together the decorating of his parents' grave 300 miles away for holidays and anniversary dates. Very very sweet family that I feel so blessed to have been a part of in one way or another.
Okay...gotta go get the tissues!
Oh my gosh, how wonderful that you had that relationship w/them and how lucky they were to have you as part of their family.
You're trying to make me feel better aren't ya?! Well I'm also not into Brad Pitt, but if we are going to dream, maybe it's Harrison Ford, Richard Gere, Ed Harris, Joseph Fiennes, George Clooney, David Duchovny.....oh yea. It's going to be a GREAT flight over the Atlantic!
Seeing George Clooney's name reminds me of when my mom was alive and she suffered from vascular dementia, which caused her to have hallucinations. But she was lucky because hers were very benign. She whispered one day that she was sleeping with George Clooney, and I had to crack up when she assured me that they hadn't done anything naughty. Hey, if you're going to hallucinate, ya might as well make 'em fun.
I'm so completely confused! I'm wondering if I should call back again tomorrow to see if I get a different answer from a different person.
( though he is not hideously ugly 
powers and was brainwashing him
You have done your best.
my head against a wall so long I can't do it anymore. I'm civil and I smile and I interact but I won't be going over to her house (my DH is the oldest of 2 boys) anymore. And my BIL is not allowed at the house until he apologizes to my girl's for his behavior in person. One DD is 23 and the youngest is underage (17) so until she turns 18, I've got control. A sad fate this is and I keep telling myself I must forgive but you know, at some point in time, you just got to say - enough is enough. Like you - I'm only 1 minute walking distance from her house. 
and air-headed some days but I'm good at heart. 
Oh well, at least they didn't stay down this time. 
for your Dad.
