MrsCobraBubbles
Life's too short to wear pants all the time
- Joined
- Jul 24, 2013
Very personal choice. To want to have children is just as fine as to not want to have children. And nothing wrong with changing your mind about not wanting to have children. And it should be your decision without any outside pressure.
Having said that, I do have to admit I have been amused by people I know who were very vocal about not wanting children......and that often is tied to the opinion marriage being "nothing more than a piece of paper".....who hit 40 and suddenly NEED to be married and have kids. Does make me wonder if the old biological clock kicks in.
It's funny you say that because one of my very best friends, who was very vocal and adamant for many years that she didn't want kids, just turned 40 and now has had a complete reversal of opinion and desperately wants to have children--with the same strong passion that she had for being childless! I was just thinking about her situation and marveling at how powerful the biological clock is! Unfortunately this decision came about 5 years after she and her husband divorced because he wanted kids and she didn't. She is sad about having passed up the chance to have kids, jealous of him and his new wife (they already have 3 kids), and going through a really rough time right now. I wish I knew how to help her, and what to say to comfort her
I'm doing my best to be supportive but I can't relate to not wanting kids and I actually sympathized with her husband when he left--though I would never tell her that--because I wanted lots of kids and my husband claimed to feel the same way before we got married, then after we got married and had one kid he refused to have any more. My desire for kids was just a tool that he used to control me for the duration of our marriage. I admired her husband for knowing what he wanted and going after it, while I stayed in my horrible marriage because I believed that I had to. Now that we are divorcing anyway I wish that I had left him years ago when he said no more kids--we have 2 kids but I always pictured myself with 6 and now that dream is impossible because at 36 I can't have any more kids.