Destash 2017 The Year to Clear

We are working with a counselor who is guiding me through setting and enforcing limits with him. DH totally agreed to stopping the hoarding when it comes to the concept of it. Where he has trouble is in the nitty gritty of knowing what he "needs" and what he doesn't need during that split second that it takes to decide whether or not to throw something away. I mean, no one in their right mind "needs" dozens of five gallon buckets filled with bent and rusted old nails, but for whatever reason, DH thought he "needed" them. Did he ever use a bent and rusted nail out of all of those buckets over the years? Nope. Not. One. Single. Time. He would spend hours looking for what he needed, only to give up out of frustration so that he went to the store and bought what he actually needed.

With DH, there is no turning off the anxiety. The only thing I am hoping to do is to focus it in a healthier direction. Instead of him obsessing over having the most of everything, I am trying to get him to obsess over keeping what he does have in an organized and pristine condition. So instead of having thousands of different sockets, just have one set of sockets that are clean, organized, rust free, and easily accessible. We aren't aiming at eliminating his hoarding as much as we are on just having a limit to it. He can collect whatever he wants so long as it fits inside the storage shed or the tool shed in a way that is neat, organized, safe, and in usable condition.
 
I have a milk-crate of "Golden Books" from when my kids were little. They have to be over 25 years old. I looked on Ebay and I see they are running about $1.00 a book.
I was just going to put them in the recyle bin-or should I keep them yet.
 
I have missed a lot of this thread because despite me "watching" it it does not come up on my alerts. I also have been working 60 to 70 hours a week as well. DD came over today and picked up a bin of odds and ends, some clothes for charity. I threw away some old hair products that she did not want and another bag of extra garbage. Not much but every bit helps
 
I have a milk-crate of "Golden Books" from when my kids were little. They have to be over 25 years old. I looked on Ebay and I see they are running about $1.00 a book.
I was just going to put them in the recyle bin-or should I keep them yet.

I would see about selling them now. Odds are they will go down in value rather than up. I would not just keep them
 


Since the last time I posted, we had baby #4. I was on bed rest most of the last two months, so any and all decluttering was due to DH. Our little one just turned a month yesterday and aside from weird, random welts/hive thing I have happen every few days, I am pretty much recovered from my c-section. We have company through this weekend and provided he leaves on Monday, I plan on starting back up the decluttering process then. We just put down new flooring in our girls' room, so all of their stuff is pulled out of their room right now and I figure this is the perfect time to start with their room. I am really ready for projects to get done around our house, but having so much junk everywhere has really slowed down our process as it seems we are constantly just trying to keep up with organizing chaotic clutter. We are hoping to be apart of our city wide garage sale May 6th, so my job is to gather up stuff around the house by then and DH is in charge of the basement and attic clean out and pricing for the sale. Anything that doesn't sell will go to be donated to our local hospital auxiliary.
 
We are working with a counselor who is guiding me through setting and enforcing limits with him. DH totally agreed to stopping the hoarding when it comes to the concept of it. Where he has trouble is in the nitty gritty of knowing what he "needs" and what he doesn't need during that split second that it takes to decide whether or not to throw something away. I mean, no one in their right mind "needs" dozens of five gallon buckets filled with bent and rusted old nails, but for whatever reason, DH thought he "needed" them. Did he ever use a bent and rusted nail out of all of those buckets over the years? Nope. Not. One. Single. Time. He would spend hours looking for what he needed, only to give up out of frustration so that he went to the store and bought what he actually needed.

With DH, there is no turning off the anxiety.
Let us know how it goes. I have a family member I am trying to understand. We only visit every other month but I can't believe what comes in during that time between.
 


Thinking about one of those bagster deals. I'm not selling anything and I'm not going to have a yard sale. While there is maybe a trunk load of donation stuff, dh thinks it's just easier to bump it all in one big clean sweep.
Anyone have success this way?

There are charities that will do pick up for you or you can list stuff on craigslist/facebook for free. I don't like to throw usable items in the garbage.
 
We are working with a counselor who is guiding me through setting and enforcing limits with him. DH totally agreed to stopping the hoarding when it comes to the concept of it. Where he has trouble is in the nitty gritty of knowing what he "needs" and what he doesn't need during that split second that it takes to decide whether or not to throw something away. I mean, no one in their right mind "needs" dozens of five gallon buckets filled with bent and rusted old nails, but for whatever reason, DH thought he "needed" them. Did he ever use a bent and rusted nail out of all of those buckets over the years? Nope. Not. One. Single. Time. He would spend hours looking for what he needed, only to give up out of frustration so that he went to the store and bought what he actually needed.

With DH, there is no turning off the anxiety. The only thing I am hoping to do is to focus it in a healthier direction. Instead of him obsessing over having the most of everything, I am trying to get him to obsess over keeping what he does have in an organized and pristine condition. So instead of having thousands of different sockets, just have one set of sockets that are clean, organized, rust free, and easily accessible. We aren't aiming at eliminating his hoarding as much as we are on just having a limit to it. He can collect whatever he wants so long as it fits inside the storage shed or the tool shed in a way that is neat, organized, safe, and in usable condition.

I'm glad you are working with a counselor. It's absolutely a coping mechanism. Plus as much as our spouses can make us anxious with all of their stuff, sometimes the lack of stuff makes them feel anxious. It's great that you have an outside voice to remind him that he's still safe without buckets of nails.
 
I have a milk-crate of "Golden Books" from when my kids were little. They have to be over 25 years old. I looked on Ebay and I see they are running about $1.00 a book.
I was just going to put them in the recyle bin-or should I keep them yet.

Do they have a smell or are they in decent condition? We have some old books that are close to 40 years old, but most got recycled.
 
There are charities that will do pick up for you or you can list stuff on craigslist/facebook for free. I don't like to throw usable items in the garbage.
Our goal is to get it out of the house in the 48 hours we have off together. If we "schedule" a pick up, I know us, we would cancel it repeatedly. And we don't want to have another pile of things we might be able to sell online. I have some trepidation about seeing things in the bagster for sure.
 
I have missed a lot of this thread because despite me "watching" it it does not come up on my alerts. I also have been working 60 to 70 hours a week as well. DD came over today and picked up a bin of odds and ends, some clothes for charity. I threw away some old hair products that she did not want and another bag of extra garbage. Not much but every bit helps

Mine only alerts me if I'm quoted or tagged (or I think if someone attaches a file) - so I usually find this thread by clicking on "watched threads" on the menu bar:

DIS help screenshot.png

It will then show a list of threads you're watching that have new posts (or there is an option to show them all).
 
Do they have a smell or are they in decent condition? We have some old books that are close to 40 years old, but most got recycled.
I looked at them and recycled the books. The pages were all really brittle. I was shocked at the prices .25 - .65. I noticed one of the books, my mom must have given my kids the books, since the 3 oldest names were in the book. My youngest dd wrote her name in the book. That brought back some memories, which made me cry. I also noticed one of my kids must of had some kind of project. In a few of the books, words, pictures were cut out. I decided to just let them go. I saved just one and I saved a book from my childhood that was in the stack. That book was in much better shape.
 
I am ashamed to say my closet bar actually fell yesterday from too much weight. DH and I will be going through clothes to donate today.
 
I managed to clean my crazy messy bedroom and closet. I reorganized my makeup but didn't get rid of anything, I use everything and cleaned it out not that long ago. I did manage to throw away some stuff that could not be salvaged or worth donating. I feel so much better even though I know I need to tackle my clothes. I'm not there yet and my friend promised to come help me since it's overwhelming.

I need to tackle the linen closet in my bathroom. It's a mess! I live in a fairly large apartment and really want to move this year or next so I really need to purge and get organized. I don't need 20 bottles of lotion especially when I move so time to purge!!!!!

I did manage to put all the books and DVDs we no longer want into boxes so I've got 2 copy paper boxes and a DSW shopping bag full of stuff to take. I'm going to take them to half price books and see if I can get even a few bucks for them. I'm hoping for $20-$30 and I will put that into our "fun" money for the summer.

We will be hosting a foreign exchange student this summer so I REALLY REALLY REALLY need to get my apartment into tip top shape. Our July project will be to get DS's room redone completely. We will need to add a second bed into his room for our guest so we will completely purge and clean his entire room top to bottom. Projects galore!
 
I've been lurking here since the thread started and don't think I've posted yet. I'm trying to really downsize all of my stuff. Im a terrible hoarder of art supplies and stationery so that's a big tackle for me. Not into make up or clothes at all and have very little electronics, etc. main thing is the art supplies by far.

I still live at home (I'm a college student) so only have the one bedroom that I share to contain everything. Ive been really motivated by everything you guys have accomplished so I really want to kick it up a gear in the coming weeks.
 
Have never posted here but my DD and I will be moving next summer to MA and have a bunch of plastic totes we moved up with us 7 years ago after my DH passed from CA to WA. At the time we couldn't manage the thought of getting rid of stuff and moved them here. we've been going through them the past few weeks.

To date have sorted through 17 totes, only 7 are filled with items we are keeping of my DH's, childhood items, special keepsakes, photos. Have donated most of the items to Salvation Army (I can't deal with having garage sales, would rather take the tax break) sold books and dvd's to half price books and consigned a few items.

Still have about 6-7 totes left and will go through Christmas stuff after the holidays, and going to be donating our two trees to DD school. Need to start going through scrapbooking items again too soon which I donate to a local women's shelter.

Had gone through our clothes after Christmas and donate to women's shelter and orphanage in Haiti, usually do this yearly anyways.

It's been a shared project for us and going through our memories have been healing.

Good luck to all in this process of decluttering take one day/area/box at a time.
 
Have never posted here but my DD and I will be moving next summer to MA and have a bunch of plastic totes we moved up with us 7 years ago after my DH passed from CA to WA. At the time we couldn't manage the thought of getting rid of stuff and moved them here. we've been going through them the past few weeks.

To date have sorted through 17 totes, only 7 are filled with items we are keeping of my DH's, childhood items, special keepsakes, photos. Have donated most of the items to Salvation Army (I can't deal with having garage sales, would rather take the tax break) sold books and dvd's to half price books and consigned a few items.

Still have about 6-7 totes left and will go through Christmas stuff after the holidays, and going to be donating our two trees to DD school. Need to start going through scrapbooking items again too soon which I donate to a local women's shelter.

Had gone through our clothes after Christmas and donate to women's shelter and orphanage in Haiti, usually do this yearly anyways.

It's been a shared project for us and going through our memories have been healing.

Good luck to all in this process of decluttering take one day/area/box at a time.
You got that right, one box at a time.
I also read, you should take pictures of things you donate.
 
You got that right, one box at a time.
I also read, you should take pictures of things you donate.

I never heard that before. Always keep my donation slips and my CPA has allowed them all.

Sold two storage pieces today for $80 which is going into our fall trip DL fund!
 

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