Teachers...do you want to hear from parents?

[LilTinkFan]

question for you teachers. Do you like your students' parents to email you at the beginning of classes? Is it helpful to hear my opinion of my child?

Ex: my ds wears his heart on his sleeve. His older sister (bff, and summer babysitter) just went to college. He is having trouble sleeping, etc. As mom, I want to email but dh says why bother.

 

[bethbuchall]

As a preschool teacher, I find those types of insights to be very helpful. Sometimes we'll notice a behavior switch mid-year and later find out that something significant has changed in the child's life. It always helps us to know where things are coming from. It's also helpful for us to know what kinds of conversations may come up.

 

[CarolAnn856]

I'm a school librarian for older elementary students, and my colleagues and I always find it helpful to get a heads up about a student, especially if he or she is going through a difficult time. Your inclination to share some thoughts with your child's teacher can be very helpful.

What tends to frustrate teachers, on the other hand, is when parents request constant, daily updates (beyond the normal lines of communication teachers have in place) on their child or when they expect super-special treatment. I'm not at all saying you are doing this. Just the opposite, really...what you are thinking of doesn't even come close to what some parents do!

My daughter is 15, and my son is starting college this fall. They grew very close this past year. I know she will miss him terribly, as DH and I will.

 

[LilTinkFan]

Thanks! I appreciate your insight.

 

[mjkacmom]

When my mother was dying (2nd mom to my kids), I emailed my twins guidance counselor (7th grade) and let them know. On day ds14 burst into tears in class, so it was good they had a heads up. My older kids were in HS and college, I didn't email their teachers.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

When my mother was dying (2nd mom to my kids), I emailed my twins guidance counselor (7th grade) and let them know. On day ds14 burst into tears in class, so it was good they had a heads up. My older kids were in HS and college, I didn't email their teachers.

I also tend to give the teachers a heads up if anything big is happening in my kids' lives as well.

I let them know the last time DH deployed(especially because we don't live anywhere near a military base sonthat it wasn't a regular thing). I also let them know when my father died because I would gone for a week and they would likely have a lot of emotions to deal with.

I think teachers do a lot of stuff to get to know kids in the first few days. But I'm sure they appreciate a heads up for things that interrupt the kids' lives and possibly their behaviors.

 

[emer95]

Yes, absolutely!
I teach 3rd grade, and the kids will start in 2 weeks. Just today I received an email from a mother letting me know about some of her son's needs and worries. I'm really thankful she emailed me. Anything we can do to make kids have an easier start to the school year is worth it.

 

[disneypofq05]

Yes, I want to hear from the parents. I have had parents email and call the school before the start of school. I always make sure to call back. I also send home a questionnaire on the first day of school for the parents to fill out. They are able to share their child's likes/dislikes, anything they want me to know, etc.

I would definitely send a message to the teacher!

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Yes, I want to hear from the parents. I have had parents email and call the school before the start of school. I always make sure to call back. I also send home a questionnaire on the first day of school for the parents to fill out. They are able to share their child's likes/dislikes, anything they want me to know, etc.

I would definitely send a message to the teacher!

We always get these surveys, and as a parent I appreciate them very much. It's nice to be able to warn(LOL) the teachers of their different personalities and quirks.

 

[Domo]

Adult teacher here. Input always handy, although sometimes it is a little over the top and frankly annoying.

 

[ddluvsdisney]

It is helpful to know if something is impacting my student at home. It often spills over into the classroom and affects them in school. It's good to have the heads up so you can be sensitive to their feelings and know why they're having a difficult time. I get really upset when I have a conference with a parent and I tell them my observations and ask if anything is going on at home that could be causing this? and they say well this happened....... so frustrating!!

 

[PollyannaMom]

...I also send home a questionnaire on the first day of school for the parents to fill out. They are able to share their child's likes/dislikes, anything they want me to know, etc...

I once got one of those once that simply asked me to describe DS "in a million words or less". I was a bit overwhelmed at first, but it turned out to be one of his best years ever!

To the OP, definitely let the teacher know. I'd keep it fairly short and "heads up-ish" in tone (rather than "helicopter-y") and I think he/she will appreciate knowing what's going on.

 

[monsterkitty]

I'm a middle school teacher and I always appreciate heads-up emails about what may affect a student. I have the students fill out a "Student Information" sheet which includes the question, "Is there anything you really want me to know about you?" and I give examples of illness in the family, student has asthma, etc.

Last year a student was being horrible other classes and he ended up getting sent to me several times. I didn't have the student, but we have teacher buddies to help with difficult kids. After about the 5th time he was sent to me and I had nothing for him to do, I had him fill out the student information sheet for me. He answered, "My mom was murdered by my step-dad in July and I watched." Nobody had bothered to let the school know this happened so we could get him help. It was so sad!

 

[Cogswel_Cogs]

I feel good for the teachers when they finally meet me at parents teachers conference. They just look so relieved and can tell they are thinking, "thank God it's not my fault."

 

[daisyduck123]

Hi!
Second grade teacher here (27 years now). On Back to School Night, I give each parent a questionnaire to fill out about their child. I do read these, and save them. I get SO MANY emails, that your email would just get lost in the shuffle. I really don't want or need emails ahead of time about that sort of thing.

 

[Magpie]

I'm not a proper teacher. As a tutor, working one-on-one, I obviously work very closely with parents and we always talk at length before I start working with their children.

However, as a parent whose kids are now both in university, we've had both teachers who want to hear from me before classes start, and teachers who prefer I don't bother them.

I well remember one who told me at our first meeting that she hadn't read my son's IEP because she liked to "form her own opinion". I pointed out that if she had she'd have known he was mildly hard of hearing, as well as quite dysgraphic, and not stuck him at the back of the class or accused him of not trying hard enough when his writing was illegible. She turned out to be quite an okay teacher in the long run, but I thought it really was a rougher start to the year than it needed to be.

I've known others, though, who seemed quite open to talking to me before classes started (or sometimes even as the previous year was winding down), and those were always our favourite teachers. So much hassle can be avoided with just a word or two.

As you can no doubt tell by the responses in this thread, some teachers will very much appreciate your email, and some won't. However, I don't think it can hurt to try, especially if you keep it short and sweet, and frame it as a, "Here's my contact info, we're excited to have you as our teacher this year, and here's a line or two about my child."

 

[CarolAnn856]

I well remember one who told me at our first meeting that she hadn't read my son's IEP because she liked to "form her own opinion". I pointed out that if she had she'd have known he was mildly hard of hearing, as well as quite dysgraphic, and not stuck him at the back of the class or accused him of not trying hard enough when his writing was illegible.

That's ridiculous! An IEP is a legal document detailing what accomodations we are required to provide! Not reading one ahead of time is absolutely not an option. I'm so glad the year turned out to be a good one despite the bad start.

 

[LilTinkFan]

I thank you each for taking time to respond.

 

[Chernabog#1fan]

I'm a middle school teacher and I always appreciate heads-up emails about what may affect a student. I have the students fill out a "Student Information" sheet which includes the question, "Is there anything you really want me to know about you?" and I give examples of illness in the family, student has asthma, etc.

Last year a student was being horrible other classes and he ended up getting sent to me several times. I didn't have the student, but we have teacher buddies to help with difficult kids. After about the 5th time he was sent to me and I had nothing for him to do, I had him fill out the student information sheet for me. He answered, "My mom was murdered by my step-dad in July and I watched." Nobody had bothered to let the school know this happened so we could get him help. It was so sad!

That is terrible. I can not even imagine what that young man will have to endure.

 

[CarolAnn856]

Hi!
Second grade teacher here (27 years now). On Back to School Night, I give each parent a questionnaire to fill out about their child. I do read these, and save them. I get SO MANY emails, that your email would just get lost in the shuffle. I really don't want or need emails ahead of time about that sort of thing.

How early is your back to school night? Mine is early, but my children's was usually not until October. If it was that late, I wouldn't want to wait until BTSN to know if a child was going through an unusual, difficult time at home.

One thing some of my colleagues do is send the form before school starts, or, since we've "gone Google," they will send a Google form for parents to fill out online (a paper copy gets sent, too, for anyone that prefers that).