DD and DS: I give them a set $ amount to work from and they get what they want. The only stipulation is they cannot have it until Christmas day. So I usually order some things online and some things I buy in stores (usually Thanksgiving weekend- it's a fun tradition we have, even DH goes!). They both will seek out the best deals to make the $ stretch, even though they get a substantial amount. I usually get them one surprise gift outside of their budget amount and fill a stocking for each of them. This will be the fifth year I've done this and it works well for us. I know what they want, I don't worry if the size, color, style, etc. is the right one, and I rarely have to make a return. They are happy and I am happy.
This is very similar to what my mom does for us and it's wonderful! We have a tradition that my mom, my sister, and I go out on Black Friday (sometimes early, sometimes not... but it's the time closer to the holidays that we can get together). My mom has an envelope inside for me, my DH, my daughter, and then my sister, her DH, and her two boys. We pay cash and shop till either we are too exhausted or the envelopes are empty. My mom truly LOVES watching us seek out bargains, what we buy, etc. And like the previous poster said, no returns. On Christmas, our gifts are all wrapped and she will throw one surprise gift in for me and my sister that she picks out herself. We are grown adults and don't mind the lack of surprises that day.
As for me and my shopping, we have cut way back over the years. When DH and I got married (and broke!) we had like 51 people to buy for, technically, if you went by tradition. We gave out lots of junk those first couple of years and I hate swapping junk honestly. Thankfully we are now down to about 19 or so I think and it's much much more manageable. I used to shop throughout the year but now that I have a school aged daughter and work full time, I'm just honestly not out and about to find the deals like I used to be. I will still order occasionally on
Amazon or something if I see a deal. I keep an Excel spreadsheet with my ideas, then what I purchased, and I cross people off as they are done. I also now do a Christmas savings account with $10 a week contributed, and as well all my rebates from Ibotta, Checkout 51, etc. And this year I've successfully maintained a 52 week challenge account as well. So since I can't shop as much throughout the year, I have at least made some provisions financially that will hopefully cover everything!
Thanks to this thread I now know what Fingerlings are, and my DD is almost 7 so even though she hasn't mentioned it, I figure it will cross our radar so I went ahead and ordered one! I figure if it doesn't show up on her list, I can probably sell it closer to Christmas and make my money back or I can donate it on a Angel Tree type program. I have bought some other small things for my DD, but sadly that is about the only start I have.