What is a Friend

[SaintsManiac]

I have different levels of friends, so it would be hard for me to define friendship.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I do wonder how much the meaning of the word "friend" has degraded with the advent of social media. "I have X number of Facebook friends!"

I'm sure that many DISers would disagree.

There are a lot of people who have become friends on the DIS but they have either not had the opportunity to meet or it's impractical. But that doesn't mean they find the meaning of the word degraded by virtue of it being a social media/internet based interaction.

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

I do wonder how much the meaning of the word "friend" has degraded with the advent of social media. "I have X number of Facebook friends!"

I don't think it has degraded the meaning much. I wouldn't consider any friend on social media a friend.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Friends means different things to different people (kinda goes without saying lol).

I have various levels of friendship.

I'd also say I have a broader definition of friends. It would be extremely limited IMO to place the same definition on everyone. Everyone is different and so everyone bonds and interacts differently.

I have friendships with people that are not the same as others.

For instance I have my DISer friends that we get together and talk Disney and Universal and many other things but a lot is focused on that. One of my best friends would have zero interest in that (especially as she and her husband aren't really into travel) but that one friend is someone I've known for over 25 years.

My husband and as a byproduct me as well has friendships with his coworkers. A decent amount of conversation centers around each other lives (more mundane things) as well as work related stuff. Some of those coworkers are more ones that we see at work related events but I would define them as more than mere acquaintances--field assignments often take coworkers away for long periods of time too so it's impractical to expect frequent, outside of work, get togethers. One of the coworkers turned into a golfing buddy for my husband when they were put together on a field assignment. We've gone and watched the Masters with them several years in a row and one year a football game but other than that and golfing here and there we don't see them a ton. That doesn't mean we don't consider them friends.

Another group of friends that were my husband's coworkers we were quite close for a few years even being in each of each other's weddings. But life has gotten in the way (field assignment, babies--multiple) and so we haven't been able to see each other much in the last couple of years. We still def. consider all of us friends and we often keep up with each other's lives via FB (I love seeing the kid's pictures for instance and keep up on any trips to family out of state, etc). We have been able to see them every now and then for sure at work events.

I don't exclude the term 'friends' the same way that others do.

I do however use "very close friend/dear friend/best friend" to denote much closer and tighter bonds.

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

That person you can call that will bring the shovel, bleach, and tarp, no questions asked.

And the best friend is the one that remains to help move the body and dig the hole!

They're all your friends until they roll over to the cops for a lighter sentence.

 

[kdonnel]

They're all your friends until they roll over to the cops for a lighter sentence.

But then you have identified an enemy so there is a bit of a positive.

 

[kaytieeldr]

A friend is somebody who knows all about you - and likes you anyway.

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

But then you have identified an enemy so there is a bit of a positive.

I say keep your friends close and your enemies on plastic

 

[low-key]

Someone who sticks up for you even when its not popular to do so

 

[ronandannette]

I know people who call everyone they know a friend. I don’t have many people that I consider true friends. I am friendly with a lot of people.

To me a friend is someone you see socially and talk to regularly. They are someone you can count on. They are not those you only say hi to if you run into them at the grocery store but don’t make effort to see or talk to beyond that.

To me, these are all types of friends; not all friendships are equally meaningful. I would refer to the friendly-acquaintance from the grocery store as a friend, and I'd refer to my BFF as a friend, but sort of the way I'd compare "loving" salted caramel to "loving" my husband.

As for the quality being directly related to the quantity - I have to disagree. Some of my favorite people are ones I just can't see very often and the deep connection is on a level beyond merely social. I think you yourself said something similar about your best friend, a few posts up, which kind of contradicts what you said here. Or maybe I misunderstood.

 

[kimblebee]

To me, these are all types of friends; not all friendships are equally meaningful. I would refer to the friendly-acquaintance from the grocery store as a friend, and I'd refer to my BFF as a friend, but sort of the way I'd compare "loving" salted caramel to "loving" my husband.

As for the quality being directly related to the quantity - I have to disagree. Some of my favorite people are ones I just can't see very often and the deep connection is on a level beyond merely social. I think you yourself said something similar about your best friend, a few posts up, which kind of contradicts what you said here. Or maybe I misunderstood.

My ears are burning lol


To me, a friend is someone who will tell me life was gonna be this way.

 

[disneychrista]

As for the quality being directly related to the quantity

I think my wording was wrong. I didn't necessarily mean you have to see them all the time. My oldest and dearest friend is someone I don't see very often. She no longer lives in the same area and has a lot going on in her life. But we do try to make an effort to see each other when possible. It is not the quantity of time spent together that makes someone a friend. It is making the effort to see them that does.

Someone who makes no effort to see me (or me them) and I only say hi to and talk with if I happen to run into them is not a friend (to me). I ran into an old co-worker. We are friendly and when we see each other we say hi and talk for a minute. But there is no effort to see each other or keep in touch out side of these random encounters.

 

[Luv Bunnies]

A friend is someone who shows up for you, even if you didn't know you needed them.

My dad passed away last year. I was greeting people in the back of the church after his memorial mass. Suddenly I turned around and one of my oldest friends was standing there. We've known each other for almost 40 years. We were in each other's weddings. We haven't seen each other over the years as much as we would have liked. I last saw her over a year ago. But there she was. She showed up at my dad's memorial, for me. It meant so much. I didn't even know how much I needed her until I saw her.

 

[ronandannette]

My ears are burning lol


To me, a friend is someone who will tell me life was gonna be this way.

The problem with that is would any of us really believe it? I can think of about a million times in life I wish I had been able to “see around corners”. In hindsight, if somebody had told me what was waiting, not only wouldn’t I have believed it, I definitely wouldn’t have had the courage to face it.

Good friends are brave enough to say hard things but smart good friends also know when to keep their mouths shut. And always, always be there to pick up the pieces and never, never say “I told you so”.

 

[kimblebee]

The problem with that is would any of us really believe it? I can think of about a million times in life I wish I had been able to “see around corners”. In hindsight, if somebody had told me what was waiting, not only wouldn’t I have believed it, I definitely wouldn’t have had the courage to face it.

Good friends are brave enough to say hard things but smart good friends also know when to keep their mouths shut. And always, always be there to pick up the pieces and never, never say “I told you so”.

That’s actually pretty deep. Now I feel bad to admit that’s the first line of the theme song for Friends

 

[Feralpeg]

Friend is a word I believe we use to casually. I have many acquaintances that I like and I spend quality time with some of them. I only have a couple of people that I call real friends. We have been close for many, many years. I know that, should I need them, they will be there for me immediately. I would do the same for them. For instance, when I was diagnosed with cancer about 7 years ago, my friend was on a plane to Orlando the next day to spend time with me. She dropped everything and flew here on her dime to make me feel better. That's a friend.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Friend is a word I believe we use to casually. I have many acquaintances that I like and I spend quality time with some of them. I only have a couple of people that I call real friends. We have been close for many, many years. I know that, should I need them, they will be there for me immediately. I would do the same for them. For instance, when I was diagnosed with cancer about 7 years ago, my friend was on a plane to Orlando the next day to spend time with me. She dropped everything and flew here on her dime to make me feel better. That's a friend.

Normally to me an acquaintance is someone who you don't really know a lot of about, you know them maybe by virtue of a specific social circle but you don't really engage in meaningful or strong bonding interactions with them and your interactions are usually brief moments here and there. Like maybe you see them in the grocery store and it's a hi and by thing. Or you see them at a work function and you talk for a few moments and then move on.

If you're spending quality time with people hopefully by defining it as quality time you know them, you find yourself bonding with them and they aren't just people you would exchange very brief pleasantries with them before moving on.

I guess personally speaking I might find myself a bit hurt if we spent what you would call quality time with me but you merely thought of me as an acquaintance. Obviously that's a personal thing because it's totally your viewpoint on the term friend

 

[diser_fam]

What is a Friend? I'm pretty sure Forky already covered this in the Forky Asks a Question series...

 

[disneychrista]

What is a Friend? I'm pretty sure Forky already covered this in the Forky Asks a Question series...

Maybe. But not all of us even know what that even is (or honestly even care.)

 

[diser_fam]

Maybe. But not all of us even know what that even is (or honestly even care.)

Ouch! Just a joke (thus the smiley face at the end). There is Pixar series on Disney+ called Forky Asks a Question and there is an episode titled "What is a Friend", which is what I thought of when I saw the title. Carry on.