Thanks everyone. We said our sad goodbys this morning. Overnight he hid under the bed and wouldn't take any comfort from me and wouldn't eat or drink, so it was time. The thing that keeps going thru my mind is "I used to be a woman who had a cat named Mike. But I'm not her any more." My other cat Whitehall is also grieving. I'd like to wait a couple months to get a new kitten, so I'm hoping she'll settle in to the new routine of just the two of us, and being the number one cat for a while.
My self care today has been to do things around the house, cleaning up here and there, organizing. It's been a dark grey damp day, up until an hour or so ago when the sun burned thru. I think tomorrow is supposed to be the only sunny day this week... it's going to be a challenge to have the weather match my emotions. I am grateful that I am feeling the emotions and I'm not numbed out, nor did I reach for anything numbing. I did watch the movie Emma for like the fifth time, a little respite.