• Controversial Topics
    Several months ago, I added a private sub-forum to allow members to discuss these topics without fear of infractions or banning. It's opt-in, opt-out. Corey Click Here

Concerned by some things I've been reading...

BeccaGrace

Reads Disney Menus When She's Sad
Joined
Jan 28, 2005
It feels like I keep seeing posts about people feeling like others are taking advantage of using GACs or ECVs or other things available for people with special needs by people who don't really need them...and thank goodness there are usually responding posts by people who recognize that disabilities or health problems are not always visible and that we shouldn't judge in these situations. My concern is that my youngest daughter is one of the people who on the surface doesn't look like she needs a GAC but we need one for keeping her out of the sun when possible because her seizure meds make her unable to sweat. Other than posts people make on the boards or among themselves, have you ever had to deal with people making comments to you about taking advantage of the system if it doesn't look like you need the assistance you are getting while at WDW? If so, how do you respond? Knowing me I'd probably start to cry because I am horrible in situations like that. I remember when my cousin had ovarian cancer and we were out and parked in a handicapped spot because she was going through chemo and was really feeling crappy and someone came up to us and yelled at her, "What gives you the right to park in that spot?" and she told the woman she had cancer and the lady didn't even apologize, she just turned around in a huff and walked away and it made me so sad and angry and powerless to make the lady understand that it was so hurtful of her to throw that in her face. And it makes me nervous to think that I might have to deal with a similar situation if we use a GAC. I'd rather be prepared with a response so I don't get emotional. So do you just tell the person your child's medical problem or do you just tell them it's none of their business? Or am I overreacting at what I've been reading and is it very unlikely that anyone would say anything or make us feel uncomfortable?
 
That's a tough one. We've never actually had anyone say anything (to our faces anyway) when using a GAC at WDW or handicapped parking anywhere. But I can feel the "looks." My son, age 12, has Down Syndrome, but his facial features are very mild. Generally, only someone very familiar with Downs would recognize that he has it. He has thick glasses and is bald from Alopecia, so those two things hide the Down's features even more. The support I've received on this and similar boards is that you know your child and his or her needs. You shouldn't feel guilty about or worry about what others think. It's their problem, not yours.

Now, I do have to admit that when I feel people are giving us the "look", then Connor takes off his hat, I enjoy the shocked look on their faces. Of course his bald head has nothing to do with his disability, but they don't know that.

Go, use the GAC or whatever other assistance you need, and enjoy your trip.

LisaB
 
I can only speak from my own experiences. But I do feel resentment sometimes towards people I think are taking advantage of the system. To me it all depends on what is considered a need vs what is considered convenient.

I've been a praplegic for 28 years now. When I first had my accident there were much fewer handicapped parking spaces. But even with fewer spaces I was almost always able to get one because there were much less handicapped plates and placards out there. I'm not even sure if they had the placards back then.

Now adays the spaces have easily tripled but they're always full. To me it seems most of the people filling these spaces don't "need" them. I'm defining need as if that space weren't available you would not be going into the store. Most of these people are parking there, saving themselves an extra 20-30 feet of walking, then walking around a huge grocery store(mall, amusement park etc).

I have to use a wheelchair to get around since I'm totally unable to stand or walk. To get my wheelchair in and out of the car I need the extra space that a handicapped spot provides. If there isn't a spot available either I wait hoping someone will leave or I go home. To me that defines "need".

I think that alot of people who have severe handicaps are seeing the limited resources taken up by those with less severe problems and this is some of what causes the friction.
 
Bill,
I am sure that I am one you don't consider to have a need for a handicapped tag. I have several chronic diseases and am in pain. Before I got my tag I just let others go to the store for me. If there is no spot my husband will drop me at the door and I will get a cart to support my walking. I'm in pain most of the time and take meds for it as well as other meds for my chroinic illnesses. Yes I can walk into the store and shop but it isn't easy or fun. And if I go to the zoo or the mall or to Disney or to my Tupperware Convention I have to use a wheelchair to get around. At least there I don't need my husband or daughters with me. I'm actually more independent in the wheelchair than walking.
 
Bill - I understand your concern. I understand there are some who don't truly need it, but also that there are others who don't look like they need it but truly do. With my son, who doesn't always need to use handicapped parking, I try to use it wisely. At places with LONG walks (ball stadiums, amusement parks, etc) he can't make the full walk. At other places it is a safety issue - like K-Mart where we wants to run up to the little merry-go-round thing or the Dr. office where he doesn't want to go at all. The shorter walk means I have less chance of him darting out into traffic, or being in the middle of traffic refusing to move.

But at neutral places where he is happy to be and there are no other distractions, we don't need the closer parking. There are other places where I know there is likely to be a larger population of folks who need it worse than us, and not enough spaces, so I don't use it unless absolutely necessary. (Church, Special Olymipic events, etc)

LisaB
 
Interestingly at church there are never enough spots. There is an area that is set aside for the elderly (senior citizens) One day dh parked there and we were yelled at by one of the seniors. We had myself who has mobility problems and my friend who is deaf-blind. Geez, give me a break. Now my husband drops us and then parks away from the building. Btw pastor told me to park there if there are no spots available and ignore the seniors complaining. Thank God for my sweet husband who is always conscious of our safety and is willing to go the extra mile for us.
 
Back to the OP's original question I think that you should not worry about using a GAC at WDW for your upcoming trip. We have used one for having our stroller as a wheelchair for some of the longer lines and never had a problem. I have seen someone ask a CM about it (rather than us directly) and I guess the answer satisfied them. No dirty looks or things like that.

It is always possible to run into that difficult (and not just curious) person but I think I'd respond with saying that you have a guess assistance card from Guest Services due to a medical condition and leave it at that. If the person questioning you notes they have a medical condition too then you can always direct them to Guest Services. Whether or not you deserve a GAC and what is on it is between you and Guest Services. I wouldn't get in the position of trying to defend myself in front of an agressive fellow tourist and your child.

Still I think it is unlikely to happen in any event! The CM's are wonderful and you'll have a great trip. :goodvibes
 


BeccaGrace said:
And it makes me nervous to think that I might have to deal with a similar situation if we use a GAC. I'd rather be prepared with a response so I don't get emotional. So do you just tell the person your child's medical problem or do you just tell them it's none of their business? Or am I overreacting at what I've been reading and is it very unlikely that anyone would say anything or make us feel uncomfortable?

The few visits we've used our GAC I've only had one negative comment and as I was preparing politely to respond, the CM who was standing there with us told me to just go on and enjoy our vacation, that she would deal with the person who was having a problem. Other than that I don't ever recall even any looks from people. We use it sparingly and descreetly.
 
I have never had the "look" while in WDW, mainly because once I park my car I normally am only seen in the wheelchair or on crutches if I am in the room. I get the "look" all the time when I am back home in N.C.
I go to college and look fairly young and I do not drive with the tag in the window full time. So normally the situation plays out this way. I pull into the handicap parking spot minus the tag, person sees me and gives me the "look", I bounce the tag up into the window and the person hesitates, I get out of the car stand up and the person does the "look" and the "glare". I put the wheelchair together sit down and start the pushing and the person feels stupid.
If my friends are with me they start signing to me for that extra bonus, "don't you feel really stupid now". :flower:
 
Interesting phenomena...

In the not-so-distant past, the debate used to be whether people really 'needed' to use wheelchairs/ECVs and parking or if they were just using then to cut though lines. (Like the OP was looking for.)

I don't see that argument as much anymore...now it always seems to be who needs them the most...and goodness help you if someone thinks your disability is less important than theirs.
 
I have had a couple of times that I have (very sweetly) told people I would be more than happy to give them my personal ECV if they would also take all of my disabilities. I have never had anyone take me up on the offer. Usually they try to find some way to extricate their foot from their mouth.

One time, several years ago, I was with a group of people. One was a woman who was legally blind almost since birth. As we were walking past a door, a woman came out without looking and ran into Helen, and started to berate her for being in the way. Then she saw Helen's white cane and stated falling all over herself apoligizing. She made a fatal mistake by including in the apology "I didn't see you". Helen very nicely killed her by saying: "That's OK, I didn't see you either."

Just remember that anyone who makes a comment is probably someone you will never meet again. I would not care what anyone thinks in that situation; but if you can come up with something to embarasses them good for you.
 
A friend of mine also has an autistic son (like mine) and he appears normal at times (when he isn't having a meltdown). When somebody said something to him, his father replied with, " I will gladly trade my son affliction for this GAC card ". Which is brilliant.

Don't get emotional, get MAD. Bill... My father has a handicapped plaque and he appears normal. He has a chronic heart disease and can not walk long distances. Before my mother passed she was on a lung transplant list. She would walk into a store, and then get a wheelchair because it was too difficult for her to get her own in and out of the car. Don't judge people because they are walking normal. That makes you no better than those berrating "make a wish" dying children that have front of the line access.

There are scumbags in this world that abuse the system BUT I truly believe that there are more good people out there than bad. I get so mad when people "assume". They don't have the right. Don't get upset, PUT THEM IN THEIR PLACE!
 
I had a very rude woman confront us in line on the Buzz ride. I used my stroller in line (GAC allowed us) since ds really needed it that day (he is autistic and sometimes needs that extra protection from people). I waited in the regular line like everyone else, except ds was sitting in his stroller. Almost the entire time in line, some lady behind me kept telling her dh "she can't do that! She can't use the stroller in line!" I just kept ignoring me until she tapped me on the shoulder and said "you can't have that stroller here". I said yes I could. She said no you can't. I finally blurted out "I have a special disability pass for my son!". Well, she shut up and her husband looked so embarassed!

Someone mentioned that people are now argueing whether such and such disability is eligible for this or that. Yes, that seems to be the new trend and it is so sad. Who is ANYONE to judge whether someone else should get special services. Don't judge someone else unless you have walked a mile in their shoes.
 
Bill - I agree with the PP regarding getting mad. I was lucky enough that no one said anything about the GAC to us - then again, I don't think anyone could tell we had it (I just discretely showed the pass to the person collecting the FPs). If anything, it may look like we had an "unlimited FP" because I kept it vs the others who had to hand theirs in.

I would have also said to anyone who confronted us about the GAC that I would gladly trade places with anyone and wait in line for hours to not have to deal with the heart issues we face on a daily basis. Granted, I'm keeping the baby ;) - I'll just switch out her anatomy with anyone with a "healthy heart"
 
I am going to assume that Topomax is the AED that your child is on which makes them unable to sweat. If you have already been through a hot summer while they were on it or live in a hot climate you probably already know how it affects your child but if not I wanted to let you know our experience because it was worse than we anticipated. We live in Nebraska so our climate is much different than that of central FL but we did have several very hot days during the summer that my son was on Topomax and I don't think any amount of shade would have helped him. He needed to be inside. There were times when we were at sporting events for our girls and we had to put Broc in the car with the AC becuase he was getting so hot. I don't think we could have made a trip to WDW that summer without someone planning on spending a lot of time in the room with Broc.

Mike
 
Mike Bartenhagen said:
I am going to assume that Topomax is the AED that your child is on which makes them unable to sweat. If you have already been through a hot summer while they were on it or live in a hot climate you probably already know how it affects your child but if not I wanted to let you know our experience because it was worse than we anticipated. We live in Nebraska so our climate is much different than that of central FL but we did have several very hot days during the summer that my son was on Topomax and I don't think any amount of shade would have helped him. He needed to be inside. There were times when we were at sporting events for our girls and we had to put Broc in the car with the AC becuase he was getting so hot. I don't think we could have made a trip to WDW that summer without someone planning on spending a lot of time in the room with Broc.

Mike

Yes, she's on Topamax....This is her first summer on it and I am starting to realize what you are saying is very true. It was in the low 70s and breezy the other day and she was drinking lots of water but after 20 minutes outside I could see her getting flushed and she had red streaks on her face and neck...so we got her right inside but I guess that's our warning that the summer may be rougher than we thought it would be.

We luckily had already planned our WDW trip for December so we are going at a cooler time but that is why I am still concerned enough to get a GAC. Unfortunately we are also going to the Outer Banks in two weeks and while we are fine with only checking out the beach in the early morning and evening my MIL didn't really get it until she saw her the other day and realized how little it takes to affect her.

Thanks for letting me know about your son and his reaction to the heat...I've been concerned with the summer coming and it's always better to be prepared with what to expect. Thanks again:)
 
Hi,
I hope you don't mind me posting here -I'm form the UK & will be visiting Disneyland Paris very shortly. My DH & I have visited WDW twice but at those times I did not have so many problems with walking (I have rheumatoid arthritis).
I am 32 & look quite young for my age & at home I often get the 'looks' that are mentioned here. I have a disabled badge & I use a walking stick or crutch to help me walk & I got so fed up a couple of weeks ago when we pulled into the supermarket & a woman pointed out that I 'didn't look very disabled', I said to her that she didn't look very ignorant but disabilities can be hidden. :teeth:
Thats the rudest I think I've ever been to someone. My DH thought it was great as the woman stood there with her mouth gaping like a fish as we walked away.

Hugs & pixie dust to you all :wizard:
 
Morveryn said:
Hi,
I hope you don't mind me posting here -I'm form the UK & will be visiting Disneyland Paris very shortly. My DH & I have visited WDW twice but at those times I did not have so many problems with walking (I have rheumatoid arthritis).
I am 32 & look quite young for my age & at home I often get the 'looks' that are mentioned here. I have a disabled badge & I use a walking stick or crutch to help me walk & I got so fed up a couple of weeks ago when we pulled into the supermarket & a woman pointed out that I 'didn't look very disabled', I said to her that she didn't look very ignorant but disabilities can be hidden. :teeth:
Thats the rudest I think I've ever been to someone. My DH thought it was great as the woman stood there with her mouth gaping like a fish as we walked away.

Hugs & pixie dust to you all :wizard:

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: Love this one, got to remember it!
 
My son is on the autism spectrum and doesn't look different. I have multiple issues, but try to ignore them. However, since my son's issues are the biggest concern in how we can enjoy a day at a park, we have the GAC.

In the past four years, I've only had ONE issue-and it was a person in a wheelchair. We were waiting for the Tiki room, and it was just this young couple and us, we were in the preshow in the row behind them. Young lady in the wheelchair kept pointing and whispering about our GAC, it was rather obvious. I finally said "just because you can't see a person's disability, doesn't mean that they don't have one". She harumped at us and then got a bit vocal (mind you, it's still my family of four and only the two of them). I ignored it.

My medical issues make me eligble for a handicapped tag-doctor keeps offering it. After the dirty looks I got in Maryland for looking okay, I'm not getting one unless absolutely neccessary.

One thing I have learned after my issues and my sons issues is that I can't judge another person's issues. I'm not them and I'm not about to say someone is more or less deserving of a GAC or Handicapped tag, that their disability is less needing of these items.

suzanne
 
Morveryn said:
I am 32 & look quite young for my age & at home I often get the 'looks' that are mentioned here. I have a disabled badge & I use a walking stick or crutch to help me walk & I got so fed up a couple of weeks ago when we pulled into the supermarket & a woman pointed out that I 'didn't look very disabled',

These people think they are doing good but enforcing the use of Handicapped spaces for Handicapped people.

But you can't tell from the outside. My brother had his second open heart operation in his thirties. From the outside he seemed an obviously healthy young man. But for a couple of months he was easily exhausted and would ask me to park in the handicapped spaces to save him extra walking.

My family has a term for that: "Who appointed you police of the universe?" when one of us starts interfering when we really shouldn't.
 

GET A DISNEY VACATION QUOTE

Dreams Unlimited Travel is committed to providing you with the very best vacation planning experience possible. Our Vacation Planners are experts and will share their honest advice to help you have a magical vacation.

Let us help you with your next Disney Vacation!











facebook twitter
Top