A bore is a man who, when you ask him how he is, tells you.
Bert Leston Taylor, The So-Called Human Race
Good breeding consists of concealing how much we think of ourselves and how little we think of the other person.
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910),
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955)
Too bad the only people who know how to run the country are busy driving cabs and cutting hair.
George Burns (1896 - 1996)
Who are you and how did you get in here?' 'I'm a locksmith. And, I'm a locksmith.'
Leslie Nielsen (1926 - ), as Lieutenant Frank Drebin, "Police Squad"
No matter how cynical you get, it is impossible to keep up.
Lily Tomlin (1939 - )