My Child invited on a Family trip , who pays for what?

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

Totally just my perspective but $600-$700 doesn't sound crazy high depending on how your home airport is on airfare and what airline you are going with along with that including spending money which I guess allows for souvenirs. Then the park admission.

OP what were you comfortable with spending in the first place?

Park admission to many, though not all, places still costs a pretty penny even if they aren't Disney lol. And it would depend on how many days and if the place gives a price break on that.

I guess the only thing I would inquire to the friend's parents about is when and why did it change from airfare & spending money to airfare, spending money & park admission.

I do agree with another poster--talking to adults first is the prudent thing to do along with clear expectations. I don't necessarily agree with no changes because sometimes things happen: airfare goes up while talking about the plans and ironing down details, hotels get too booked, random price increases--you know like the ones Disney has done quite a bit recently AND we have the benefit of being in the know on the DIS but other people don't and other entertainment companies out there can do the same with pricing, etc). If the changes are "we decided to go with this swanky hotel instead" that's different that what I mentioned above.

 

[Disneyland1084]

Three years ago, we took my DD's best friend (then age 10) to Disneyland with us. When I asked her parents, I made it very clear it would be an all expense paid trip.

 

[Katie Dawn]

Is the family paying for Anything? Food, flights, tickets... Just lodging I guess?

I can't imagine inviting a child/teen on a trip without contacting the parents to ask them first.

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

I think it’s cruddy that they changed the offer. Good for your daughter for understanding though.

 

[LovesTimone]

I had something sorta like this happen... I was about 17, I was invited to go to the beach with my friend and her family, and couple of other friends were coming along we were celebrating our friends 18th birthday... so we get to the beach and this fancy resort, and we get to check in desk, 2 rooms and the Dad said so who is going to pay for the other room, we all were like ha ha so funny, and he was like no really.... its your room you need to pay for it... One of the other girls was like your kidding, you invited us to come along, and no one said anything about paying for the our room, I was so stunned, so I asked the hotel clerk, what is the total cost.... well its 350 dollars a night, so for 3 nights... and resort fees and tax, plus over night parking which was like 40 bucks a night ... we were almost at 1,400 dollars... I was like I don't have 350 dollars for my part, plus food for the weekend (which I did have that I saved and plus my Dad gave me some extra just in case)... So I asked if there was a phone I could use... So I called my Dad... and he hit the ceiling... and was like just come home right now... So after driving 5 hours to this resort... and had to drive 5 hours back... and worst part was our friend came with us, she was so mad at her Dad, and embarrassed she refused to stay... she cried the whole way back, and just kept apologizing... It was just awful... I felt so bad for her... she stayed with me for the weekend, and then on Monday she packed up all her stuff and move to Ohio to go live with her Grandparents... We all took her to the airport to say goodbye... As far as I know she never spoke to her parents after that...

So at least they let you know in advance... and the 600 to 700 dollar sounds low ball to me... It would probably be double that more in the 1200 to 1400 dollar range... While it is unfortunate that your DD isn't going... at least she understand... So just go on with your summer and have fun...

 

[karen4546]

My brother and SIL invite their daughter's friend/friends on trips at least once a year. My niece is now 16 and they recently went on a cruise and are going back to WDW in August and she invited her best friend for each of these trips. The only money that my brother said the my niece's guest needed to bring was for extras like souvenirs. They had the dining plan at Disney and the cruise wason the Carnival Dream-so most food in included.

IMO when you "invite" someone then you cover the cost. If i invite someone to lunch or dinner then i am paying. If I ask them to join then their costs are their responsibility.

IF they INVITED your daughter then cost on them except spending money. If they said she could JOIN them then the cost is on your daughter.

have fun on your family vacation.

 

[_19disnA]

^^ I wouldn't assume the other family is picking up all of the expenses unless the family doing the inviting is very well off. IF they OFFER to pay for everything is different from ASSUMING they will.

The parents of the person being invited should have a discussion with the parents planning the vacation so there is no misunderstanding. I can't tell from the OP's comments if they have spoken with the parents or if the daughter is just relaying things that have been said. If you drive someplace, having an extra person in the car doesn't add to the expense, but if you are flying to the destination then obviously an airline ticket would be involved.

 

[Darcy03231]

Anytime we've invited the kids friends to join us we pay for everything except spending money. Once a family paid for their child's airfare because they had frequent flyer miles that were going to expire, which was appreciated, but we would have covered it.

 

[RangerPooh]

Our family is looking at bringing DDs friends along on vacation. What we have decided is that the friends family will cover their park ticket and airfare (or at least a portion of it), and spending money. We'd pay for the meals and hotel. But we'd also discuss this well enough in advance that expectations are known. Every family has a different budget and IMO it's imperative to be transparent on what is expected to be contributed.

 

[mjkacmom]

Most of the time, a child is invited for the benefit of the family’s child. I can’t imagine putting another family on the spot and asking if they would pay money to send their child on my family vacation.

 

[anniemae]

I don't think there is a right or wrong. The inviting family can either pay for the child or not. they set the terms IMO. You, as the invitee, can either accept or decline. I hate all the "rules" about what is proper and what is not.

 

[Allison]

There is not right or wrong here. They told you what they would expect for you to pay and now you can make an informed decision.

 

[MrsCobraBubbles]

When we invited my son's friend to go to Disney with us (the boys have been friends since they were 3, the friend's dad and I grew up in the same neighborhood, living across the street from each other since we were 10 so we've been friends for years and have gone on many trips together but this was the first time one of the families was inviting the other on a trip involving a plane ride), I asked his dad to book his plane tickets and mentioned that he would want souvenir money, but that I would cover park tickets and all the other costs. I believe the round trip plane ticket was about $200 and I only asked him to pay for it because I am a single mom, asking him was a last-minute decision and I hadn't budgeted for his presence on our trip and at the time that the airfare needed to be booked I didn't have an extra $200 to pay for his ticket. Other than that, we've only ever taken friends on road trips and we covered all the costs for those trips because I think the host should pay. But maybe this family can't afford to pay right now? Maybe they are offering what they can afford.

 

[HopperFan]

Have only invited another twice, both for DD and these were teenagers. Overall I'm not a fan of taking a friend along, and I never let my kids go on trips with others.

Costs were explained well in advance with no variation down the road. We drove to both (@ 8 hours).

1) Took a friend with us on a beach trip that included Busch Gardens. Friend paid for her Busch Gardens ticket and brought spending money. We covered everything else.

2) Took a friend to Disney with us. Stayed on property. Friend paid for her Disney Ticket ~ Hopper/Plus as we did both water parks, but when we added a day I paid for it. She also brought spending money. I paid for everything else.

Both times I purchased discounted ticket and had the parents reimburse me so they could save money.

 

[Minnesota!]

If I invite someone, I pay for all the "necessities" - air, hotel, any meals we have together, tickets, etc. They would be responsible for meals on their own, shopping, tips, snacks, etc.

 

[kdonnel]

I have taken many trips with other families kids. I have always been upfront with them what their expected contribution is and have always stuck to it even if prices changed.

We are apparently the only family that vacations away in our immediate friend circle so my kids have been invited to do local things but not on away trips. In those instances the parents have always made it clear what the expected contribution is and have not wavered.

 

[danielocha30]

that’s not a invitation it’s s proposal, Now the point is that the friend mom should have ask you before getting the kids involved, at least that’s what I would have done. Now the kids are all excited and it’s a disappointment that you can not afford the trip. And happy to hear your child is ok with the situation it tells a lot.

 

[Moliphino]

I don't think I'd have any set expectations on who pays what, but I would expect it to all be well defined before any decisions are made to accept or decline the invitation.

 

[design_mom]

I also don't think there's a right/wrong answer here, as long as everyone agrees to the costs up front. I don't necessarily have a problem with them asking for her to pay for her own discrete costs (like tickets/admissions), but it sounds like the trip costs were discussed as airfare/spending money only. You agreed that you could afford that, and she planned to go. Now they're changing the rules/requirements and that doesn't seem fair.

 

[iivye]

We are taking my daughter's friend to Disney with us next month. I am covering all her expenses. I wouldn't invite her if I couldn't cover all the costs because I don't know her family's financial situation and wouldn't want to put them in an awkward situation. However, if my daughter was invited to go with another family and they asked me to pay her share I wouldn't mind. Each family is different and our family is lucky to be able to afford to bring someone.