Please don't be angry with her for this, please. I lost my 35 yr old daughter and I can not tell you what grief will have you doing and acting. Maybe there were words that needed to be said between them and this was her only way to get closure. People do touch other people's life even though they were not important to them at the time. Trust me like a previous poster said it was done out of love. And I am so sorry for your loss , I am truly sorry. All that being said, I did have a brother in law that was a carpenter pass away, many years ago and one of our cousins put a hammer in the casket with him, now that was extreme, and to this day I still think how crazy that was, knowing he was probably hit in the head when the casket lowered, good grief ..lol.