Okay..figured I'd post this here. May seem insignificant..but it was big for me! Now hear this....(can I have a drum roll please) My 22 year old daughter broke up with her MORON boyfriend.
yep..you read it here first! I feel like Christmas came early this year!
I've waited TWO years for this to happen. Not so paitently either.
There was that time shortly after she first met him when I threatened to run him over with my truck.
Bob told me then that..."A...you need to get some medication"...and .."B..you have to stop saying things like that
out loud." That if anyone was going to kill the guy..it would be him. He figured the kids needed me..and visiting me prison would be a real PITA. After taking a chill pill, I realized he was probably right. It is a long drive upstate.
Sooo.. on another occasion (family BBQ) I casually let it slip how sometimes people have been swallowed up by the earth, never to be heard from ever again. What..come on
..tell me you've never heard of this? Maybe it's something that just happens in Italian families. My mom..she's quite the story teller.
Hey..I was just makin' a little innocent conversation. Kid looked shaken
..but still hangin' in there. I was getting desperate.
Then I had an idea.
I was gonna try the "nice route". I invited him to Christmas Eve
and actually gave him a gift. I tell ya..the look on his face as he carefully unwrapped it
. Dope looked as if he was opening an explosive device.
Oh..that was priceless..brings a tear to my eye just thinking about it.
Anyway..my daughter started working full time about 6 months ago. Real job..real benifits..real WORK. At some point she started to see Prince Charming wasn't all she thought he was. My husband was right (don't ya just hate when that happens ladies
). He said we need to trust that we brought her up right..and that
eventually she would see him for what he really was.(a no good looser who will suck the life out of her with his "feel sorry for me"
attitude. Not to mention he couldn't finish school or hold a job..or that he was thrown out of the military. Seems the more we objected ..the closer they got. (excuse me..gotta find the puke smiley again....
..there ya go...I feel better now)
She actually kicked him to the curb about three weeks ago. I've hesitated getting too happy over it, since in my experience, it usually doesn't
take the first time around.
I knew something was up
...as she started getting all weepy when being asked to clean her room?
..We're a little past that sort of thing. That's when she told me she'd had a rough week and that she had broken it off with moron boy because...get this
.." he wasn't living up to my expectations". I swear I thought I'd died and gone to heaven
" not living up to her expectations!" MY GOD..
she has expectations!
Who knew?
Since she's broken it off...she's become Little Miss Happy Go Lucky!
I haven't seen her this happy in quite a while. She's pleasant..she's going out with her girlfriends. She looks as if the weight of the world has been lifted from her shoulders.
As far as I'm concerned ...she NEVER has to clean her room again!
Oh..and did I mention she has a "date" this week with a guy who has a real job (he's an aero space engineer) and an apartment. Wait...an apartment...
Maybe I'll have to tell him the story about how the earth sometimes swallows people up.