Trying to get back into a "Disney-mood"

[GRAYWIFE]

I have been off the boards for the last week. (I hope I am posting this in the correct forum, I didn't know where else to put it!)

I had to go out of town to attend my grandmother's funeral. It may sound silly but I am having a hard time getting excited about our trip next week. I was sooooo excited and then we began dealing with the probability that my grandmother was going to die. My mother and I began preparing for the possibility that she could pass away while we were on our trip and how we could handle it. I even talked to the concierge about emergency flight arrangements. Then she passed away last Monday and on the drive down to Missouri my mother and I discussed how it feels a little odd to me to be going to WDW 2 weeks after her death. My mother is a "life goes on" kind of person but it still feels bad to be excited about a trip at this time. My mother felt sad that my grandmother did not get to experience WDW with her grandchildren like my mother has been able to.

My question for everyone is this...Have you ever just not been excited about your trip to WDW for some reason? and if you have...how did you snap out of it? Any suggestions to get me back in the "Disney-mood"?

Thanks to all for letting me get this off my chest. I would appreciate your suggestions and experiences.

 

[dansyr]

First of all, let me say I am so sorry for your loss.
I know it is hard to get in the Disney mood but I think as soon as you set foot on Disney property you will get right into the mood.
I think your mom would want you to have a great time and she will be looking down on you also enjoying your smiles and laughter.
My mom and dad both passed away, and I always think they are watching all the great times I'm having and enjoying the fact they raised me to be a good hearted, responsible adult which has allowed me to experience alot of things they didn't.
Your mom will be with you in spirit enjoying all those magical moments right along with you.

Have a great time !!!

 

[dansyr]

I just realized we will be there at almost the exact same time !!! I'll be thinking of you and hoping you are having as wonderful as time we are !!!

 

[Granny]

My sympathies for the loss of your grandmother.

I wouldn't worry about getting the "Disney magic" back. You can't force yourself to feel a certain way. Just head to Orlando, and let the vacation weave it's own imprint on you.

Maybe this will be a more reflective vacation. Or maybe it will be more fun than you would have thought possible. Don't worry...it's all good.

 

[WebmasterPete]

Let me add my condolances on the loss of your Grandmother. It's never easy to lose someone. About 5 weeks after my Father passed away in July of 2001, I went on a cruise. I felt the same things you are feeling. Should I be out here enjoying myself when I just lost someone who is so important to me? The most important thing for me to do then (and even now sometimes), is just allow myself to feel whatever I'm feeling, and not judge it. Feelings are not right or wrong, they just are. Everyone deals with grief in different ways. Just allow yourself the experience, and try to enjoy your time at Disney as well as the many wonderful memories that you have of your Grandmother.

Best of luck,
Pete

 

[Freyja]

I really believe I can understand your feelings. We had always planned on taking our first trip as a family to WDW with my parents, since my mom wanted to be part of the kids magical experience. However, my mother passed away very suddenly last summer (she died in her sleep at the age of 50).

Now, we´ll be going to WDW in 38 days and it still makes me cry when I think about her not being there with us in person. I´m sure she´ll be there though, in spirit and in our hearts.

I think we just have to be greatful for our own health and life and for being fortunate enough to be able to experience the magic. Life does go on and I believe the best way to honor the spirit of our loved ones is to make the most out of it.

I really hope you find the strength the enjoy your vacation
Freyja

 

[goofyernmost]

My goodness Freyja, how tragic a loss! I am sure that it will influence your time at Disney but your attitude seems good and uplifting.

We must remember that life goes on. Those that have left us wouldn't want to be the cause of our not living it to the fullest. When you see just how fast and suddenly it can all end one must grab for the brass ring while we can. 9/11 had that effect on many people, myself included.

I remember when my Dad passed away. He was in his 70's but nonetheless, it was suddenly and unexpected at that time. The stresses of dealing with my Mother, Sister and my children were intense. To make the situation worse, my Mother, in a moment of disorientation, fell down a flight of stairs (one week after my Dads death). She was fortunate that she only sustained a broken wrist and many, many bruises but it was just the straw that broke the camels back, so to speak.

Fortunately, I live within a three hour drive from the Atlantic Coast of Maine. The only way I could pull myself out of the "funk" I was in was to go there and do the thing that I enjoy almost as much as WDW and that was walk along the beach and listen to the waves and the wind.

Staying away from the things you love, will not bring back those you lost. Going, however, may help you cope with it better by showing you the beauty that is available for the taking. Graywife, I think you would be doing your Grandmother wrong to make her passing the cause of more grief. Take her life and spirit with you and you will find that, even though missed, she will be with you emotionally. My best to all.

 

[Strings]

I wanted to express my condolances to you. As for your Disney trip, I'd say go with the flow. You might find you want to go commando and keep yourself so busy you don't think about anything. You might just want to hang out at the pool and relax. Do whatever feels right to you. I'll add you to my prayers.

 

[DrTomorrow]

Condolences on your loss - it is tough at first. 10 years ago my father passed away in May, and DW, DS and I had a June WDW trip scheduled - my dad had been very excited for us. Afther thinking about it, and discussing with other family, we decided that the best way to honor his memory was to go and have the best time we possibly could.

Here are my thoughts - when I'm finally dead (many many years from now) I do NOT want people moaning, crying and making themselves miserable. I want them to remember me fondly, tell some stories about my past and celebrate the life I did have - then get on with living. So that's how I try to deal with the passing of those close to me.

As to how to get back in the mood - time is the biggest factor, but a little Disney immersion might help: rent some Disney movies, reread the UG / Birnbaum, and spend lots o' time on the DIS!

Good luck.

 

[jerseydizdreamer]

I'm so sorry for your loss. It may well take a while for not only you to emerge from the shadows of this trying time, but for you to even IMAGINE getting excited about a vacation... even if it IS to Disney.

For me, when the going gets rough and I need to feel the magic, I pop in a CD I made which features music from Fantasmic and Illuminations, which might well be my all-time favorite piece of music. I close my eyes and remember the amazing thrill that runs through my body each time either of these amazing shows begins.

You're in the thoughts of all your Disney pals.

Richard

 

[ktulu]

Sorry to hear about the loss of your Grandmother. I will pray for comfort for you and your family, as well as a safe trip to WDW.

When my wife and I were on the way to WDW, that morning, and a couple days up to it I wasn't very excited. On the trip down, I thought about work and other issues, we found out before we left that our house may have a structural problem. Even as we passed under the WDW sign, it still didn't hit. When we went under the Wilderness Lodge sign, my brain shutoff and went into full on Disney mode I know this will happen for you too, I think it happens to all of us at some point!

darren

 

[GRAYWIFE]

To Everyone: Your sympathy and advice is wonderful. I am feeling better today. Had a bad moment at my office this morning and I came to this board and found all of your wonderful words. I really appreciated it.

A man at my office thinks I am more physically exhausted rather than in a depression. He thinks a trip to WDW will be the cure. I hope so.

Again, thank you all so much.

dansyr: see in in WDW in 7 days!