What would you do? UPDATE: Pg 7--I'm not fooling :)

[disneykidatheart]

I wonder if they've found another "friend" with whom to live rent free.

 

[Hannathy]

Oh No!!!
That's April fools day!




Just kidding, I hope, glad things are coming to an end. Start bringing them home boxes and maybe a few Rubbermaid totes....

 

[RitaZ.]

In my book, pride would have have been paying rent as soon as possible. That's a strange pride going on there.

Not wanting to mess up a friendship with a business relationship? Seems like they wouldn't have wanted to mess up a friendship with a mooching relationship, but at least they are going now.

They had a good thing going. Good for them that is. No telling how long they would've stayed if you hadn't brought up one word, "rent". That is some crazy stuff.

I agree. I think the word arrogance seems more fitting.


Good to know that they will be gone soon.

 

[mumto3girls]

In my book, pride would have have been paying rent as soon as possible. That's a strange pride going on there. Not wanting to mess up a friendship with a business relationship? Seems like they wouldn't have wanted to mess up a friendship with a mooching relationship, but at least they are going now. They had a good thing going. Good for them that is. No telling how long they would've stayed if you hadn't brought up one word, "rent". That is some crazy stuff.

Exactly. I don't think I would even be comfortable living with my parents rent free. Nothing proud about that. I can't imagine behaving in that way. And the laundry situation? I would have been fitting my laundry in around yours even if that meant doing it in the middle of the night or when you were out and that would only have been if I absolutely could not have afforded to go to a laundromat so as not to further inconvenience you. Wow.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I wonder if they've found another "friend" with whom to live rent free.

I wondered the same thing. Another friend, another secret arrangement. You could keep that gig going for quite a while.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

In my book, pride would have have been paying rent as soon as possible. That's a strange pride going on there.

Not wanting to mess up a friendship with a business relationship? Seems like they wouldn't have wanted to mess up a friendship with a mooching relationship, but at least they are going now.

They had a good thing going. Good for them that is. No telling how long they would've stayed if you hadn't brought up one word, "rent". That is some crazy stuff.

I agree. I think the word arrogance seems more fitting.


Good to know that they will be gone soon.

Lack of humility?

For pride--I was thinking that they were taking pride in the friendship and thus would not want to mess it up. We are such great friends after all? That was how I intended it. [ETA: It seems it is one of the 7 deadly sins and thus is not admirable and that is how I was using it. Humility is the virtue that counters that.]

I'm just going by how they have also described themselves. They were too proud of themselves to let anyone know that they had failed. Not that it was his fault that he lost a job and lost their ability to rent ($$$)--but by their own admission, their pride got in the way of allowing anyone to know they were vulnerable.

Whether this is a correct application of the word---I apologize if it is not. They do lack humility. Appearance is more important and no matter if it is for the best that they are not renting ($$$)--they did not care for the appearance of the relationship to change to where I presume they were servant (the tenant) and we were master (landlord). Their pride would not let them do that. Apparently it was not an issue in the gratis circumstance.

Anyway--don't mean to defend them. Just explaining the selection of the word even if I used it incorrectly.

And yes--arrogance is something I have witnessed from time to time.

I wonder if they've found another "friend" with whom to live rent free.

I wondered the same thing. Another friend, another secret arrangement. You could keep that gig going for quite a while.

No idea--I will certainly let you know if I find out where they move. I presume they must ask us to assist them, in which case we would find out. But I wonder if that will be discouraged.

She did update her vague post to let people know she was moving. So if it a secret arrangement again, she will have a bit of trouble keeping it secret for too long since she publicly announced her move.

Oh No!!!
That's April fools day!




Just kidding, I hope, glad things are coming to an end. Start bringing them home boxes and maybe a few Rubbermaid totes....

I've done enough. They are perfectly capable of getting boxes and totes on their own.


Thanks all! Keep good thoughts that all goes as "planned"--from my end. While I hope their permanent arrangement works out--I'm just wanting good thoughts that the April 1 plan goes through without a hitch.

Dare I say--they aren't even Disney fans. The writing was on the wall.

 

[disneykidatheart]

We will be waiting on the edge of our seats for an update on April 1. Good luck!

 

[OceanAnnie]

Lack of humility?

For pride--I was thinking that they were taking pride in the friendship and thus would not want to mess it up. We are such great friends after all? That was how I intended it. [ETA: It seems it is one of the 7 deadly sins and thus is not admirable and that is how I was using it. Humility is the virtue that counters that.]

I'm just going by how they have also described themselves. They were too proud of themselves to let anyone know that they had failed. Not that it was his fault that he lost a job and lost their ability to rent ($$$)--but by their own admission, their pride got in the way of allowing anyone to know they were vulnerable.

Whether this is a correct application of the word---I apologize if it is not. They do lack humility. Appearance is more important and no matter if it is for the best that they are not renting ($$$)--they did not care for the appearance of the relationship to change to where I presume they were servant (the tenant) and we were master (landlord). Their pride would not let them do that. Apparently it was not an issue in the gratis circumstance.

Anyway--don't mean to defend them. Just explaining the selection of the word even if I used it incorrectly.

And yes--arrogance is something I have witnessed from time to time.








No idea--I will certainly let you know if I find out where they move. I presume they must ask us to assist them, in which case we would find out. But I wonder if that will be discouraged.

She did update her vague post to let people know she was moving. So if it a secret arrangement again, she will have a bit of trouble keeping it secret for too long since she publicly announced her move.





I've done enough. They are perfectly capable of getting boxes and totes on their own.


Thanks all! Keep good thoughts that all goes as "planned"--from my end. While I hope their permanent arrangement works out--I'm just wanting good thoughts that the April 1 plan goes through without a hitch.

Dare I say--they aren't even Disney fans. The writing was on the wall.

I understand. I was going by how I thought they must have described "pride" for themselves.

I don't think you applied it incorrectly. I think people can certainly feel pride the way you described it. But to me, it's misplaced.

I think of pride as taking care of your responsibilities the best way you can and that isn't a free ride off of friends when you are on your feet. They were too proud to let anyone know they failed, but not too proud to keep taking when they could've contributed. I don't know. It's just sounds warped.

I think you and your DH are good people. You did a very good thing helping out friends in need. It's a shame they took advantage of it.

 

[Disney Doll]

Just a point for consideration, your friend had no qualms moving into your home, making you feel like an inadequate houskeeper, set limitations on visitors to your home & was nervy enough to expect you to accommodate her laundry room territorial demands and now has nerve enough to balk at payment of any compensation when their finances make a Biblically miraculous rebound? How are they going to qualify for a mortgage these days w/ such a short time at new job, months of no housing expenses to show & downpayment funds coming from outside sources? If that's true on any level we are headed right back into another housing and financial crisis in a red hot minute.

This. And if these people dared to make any commentary about the way I lived my life to anyone, my only response would be "well it seemed to be OK when they were living here for free for 6 months" or whatever the time period has been.

Keep it a secret??? I don't think so. And I'd have no qualms saying that to anyone at any time.

Honestly though OP, I think you're better off telling them it's time to go. As soon as they start paying rent, you're going to hear "well we ARE paying rent so I'd like to change the laundry schedule" or "well we ARE paying rent so I'd like to do X" or "we ARE paying rent and even though you want to entertain tonight it will disturb us". Time to go. Buh bye.

And I agree with the PP about changing locks and codes on your home. Bad vibe from these people.

 

[Disney Doll]

What is sad there is more to the story. On a funny side note--all those memes that go around on facebook where the mom runs the dryer 5 or 6 times to dewrinkle the laundry that has been sitting there for 3 days? THAT'S SO ME!!!!!

That's right. I don't iron. If it comes out of the dryer wrinkled it gets washed again.

 

[NHdisneylover]

Phew! I am glad they are going to leave and soon. Reading this, I agree with everyone that the friends were taking advantage by not offering any money once they had income, and being demanding about things like the washer and dryer (and the whole secret thing! Just wow).

I hope they leave when they said they will and that it is drama free. I am sure it will feel good to your entire family to have your home back to yourselves.

 

[elgerber]

Jumping in to comment on the letter that they asked for. It is actually quite common. I work in mortgage (well I was just layed off LOL) but for some programs or certain credit scores, a verification of rent payment is required. If the person doesn't pay rent, we would have to get "rent free" letter from the person they were living with to verify that.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

Reality has arrived--we almost have our house back. They have spent the last week selling off a few furniture pieces (theirs ). Yesterday they rented a truck and moved their freezer and a couple pieces they were keeping. And right now they are loading their van for their remaining items to move into their hotel. They opted for an extended stay place with a negotiated month rate just a little bit more than what we would have charged. Not too shabby. Not sure why they didn't look sooner. And yes, I actually went "house" hunting with them. We saw 3 places and we were mocking the show--all in good fun.

As it turns out--joke is on me. I broke my ankle last week and I am non-weight baring. My husband is totally convinced they were hoping we would ask them to extend their stay for free--but that ship has sailed and we had no intention of doing that. I really don't know if they expected that.

In any case--my kids excitedly wait the moment they can be turned loose to reclaim their basement.

And I did see the house model where they signed their contract for the house. I don't pretend to know why they could scoot on in and get a house. Nor do I care. But it seems we always seem to have a set of friends that gets to do the unthinkable and end up in a better circumstance than we do when it seems completely illogical. C'est la vie.

Lesson learned!

And while it may be April 1st--it seems that we have not been fooled and it is all over. Now where is the one legged emoticon for the happy dance?

 

[OceanAnnie]

Reality has arrived--we almost have our house back. They have spent the last week selling off a few furniture pieces (theirs ). Yesterday they rented a truck and moved their freezer and a couple pieces they were keeping. And right now they are loading their van for their remaining items to move into their hotel. They opted for an extended stay place with a negotiated month rate just a little bit more than what we would have charged. Not too shabby. Not sure why they didn't look sooner. And yes, I actually went "house" hunting with them. We saw 3 places and we were mocking the show--all in good fun.

As it turns out--joke is on me. I broke my ankle last week and I am non-weight baring. My husband is totally convinced they were hoping we would ask them to extend their stay for free--but that ship has sailed and we had no intention of doing that. I really don't know if they expected that.

In any case--my kids excitedly wait the moment they can be turned loose to reclaim their basement.

And I did see the house model where they signed their contract for the house. I don't pretend to know why they could scoot on in and get a house. Nor do I care. But it seems we always seem to have a set of friends that gets to do the unthinkable and end up in a better circumstance than we do when it seems completely illogical. C'est la vie.

Lesson learned!

And while it may be April 1st--it seems that we have not been fooled and it is all over. Now where is the one legged emoticon for the happy dance?

Thanks for the update!

Sorry about your ankle! Ouch!

But, it will be so very nice to get back to normal! I hope you have some sort of celebration for your family! I'm sure I don't have to mention this, but don't let they come back!

Be good to yourself.

 

[Robinrs]

Reality has arrived--we almost have our house back. They have spent the last week selling off a few furniture pieces (theirs ). Yesterday they rented a truck and moved their freezer and a couple pieces they were keeping. And right now they are loading their van for their remaining items to move into their hotel. They opted for an extended stay place with a negotiated month rate just a little bit more than what we would have charged. Not too shabby. Not sure why they didn't look sooner. And yes, I actually went "house" hunting with them. We saw 3 places and we were mocking the show--all in good fun.

As it turns out--joke is on me. I broke my ankle last week and I am non-weight baring. My husband is totally convinced they were hoping we would ask them to extend their stay for free--but that ship has sailed and we had no intention of doing that. I really don't know if they expected that.

In any case--my kids excitedly wait the moment they can be turned loose to reclaim their basement.

And I did see the house model where they signed their contract for the house. I don't pretend to know why they could scoot on in and get a house. Nor do I care. But it seems we always seem to have a set of friends that gets to do the unthinkable and end up in a better circumstance than we do when it seems completely illogical. C'est la vie.

Lesson learned!

And while it may be April 1st--it seems that we have not been fooled and it is all over. Now where is the one legged emoticon for the happy dance?

I just found this thread and am GLAD I did when it was OVER!

I'm a fanatic about my space and wouldn't have invited them in the first place but if they had the NERVE to build a house I'd rent a UHAUL for them and pack it myself!!

Glad it's over. Don't worry about how people do things, you just do what's right for you. Personally, I'd be able to buy a HOUSE if I lived rent free for a few months, they are get over artists. And not wanting people to know? I'd blast them on Facebook with pictures then show up on JUDGE JUDY!!!

 

[NHdisneylover]

Good to hear that you really are about to have your home back and can enjoy being just yourselves again Sorry about that ankle though

 

[NFLDERS]

Thanks for the update!

Sorry about your ankle! Ouch!

But, it will be so very nice to get back to normal! I hope you have some sort of celebration for your family! I'm sure I don't have to mention this, but don't let they come back!

Be good to yourself.

 

[NFLDERS]

Thanks for the update!

Sorry about your ankle! Ouch!

But, it will be so very nice to get back to normal! I hope you have some sort of celebration for your family! I'm sure I don't have to mention this, but don't let they come back!

Be good to yourself.