A difficult confession

You CAN do it, but yes it is hard. My father is a recovered alcoholic. I remember the last time he broke a ten year recovery mark. He didn't get sober again for 5 years. Those were incredibly difficult years. Love yourself enough to do this. You are worth it. Lots of hugs and good thoughts coming your way during this time.
Just editing to add.....Don't make promises to your wife/ kids ( you didn't mention if you all have them yet.), as a family member it's like promising them you will recover from cancer. This takes effort every single day, and while it will get easier, there may always be a temptation. Your wife can help by obviously not drinking herself and do not go to events right now where alcohol is present. I'm sure you already have, but if you haven't find a sponsor asap.
 
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So, I guess, a little bad news. my neuropathy is back. Shaking again, can't feel my face. I've pretty much put myself in the grave. I can only laugh now. I've though about how I'd like to be buried... I've cried too much. Ive been angry with Disney for their policy on pass holders. Ive been angry with myself, I've been angry with the liquor companies, but the only person to be angry with is me for my decisions.

I can only hope that I can be the 1000th in the haunted mansion. :)
 
If you need to talk to someone please call this number 1-800-273-8255. Hope that things start looking up for you :lovestruc
 
I also wanted to say that my Uncle was an alcoholic. It took him 3 tries in rehab before he quit drinking. Don’t give up, you got this.
 
So, I guess, a little bad news. my neuropathy is back. Shaking again, can't feel my face. I've pretty much put myself in the grave. I can only laugh now. I've though about how I'd like to be buried... I've cried too much. Ive been angry with Disney for their policy on pass holders. Ive been angry with myself, I've been angry with the liquor companies, but the only person to be angry with is me for my decisions.

I can only hope that I can be the 1000th in the haunted mansion. :)
Try to give yourself time, this takes a great deal of compassion for yourself and from others in your life.
 
I know that I have said this tirelessly... Thank you all. I'm mawkish in saying this, but your words are not unheard. They are not passed by, either.

One little spark... creates creation.

ETA is something I just learned. Everyday, I doubt myself more, but everyday I learn more about myself. Every shake or tremor makes me stronger. Every time i vomit, I can eat again. Every time I lose my balance, I can go on Space Mountain :) I can only get stronger :)
 
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Day 1 starts again today. I'm so damn tired of myself. I'm sure you all are tired of me, as well. Overtime I think I beat it...

I'm a .12
 
Day 1 starts again today. I'm so damn tired of myself. I'm sure you all are tired of me, as well. Overtime I think I beat it...

I'm a .12
You can make today a great day! You can do this, we are all routing for you no matter what
 
Best of luck with your new start today :flower3: Find something (even if it is small) to be grateful for.... and let that be your beacon for the day.
 
Had a pretty bad day, but picked myself up.

I have a breathalyzer. I drank today, but my wife is going to keep strict hands on me.

I have a very important flight on 8/15. I need to keep my nausea, shaking and sweats down. This might be the most important trip of me life.

The pain to come will be horrible. But, I've done it before.

The worst of all of this, is that I found out my stepfather is dying. I can get through this.

If any of you are religious, please ask God to give me strength. If you're not, try to send me good thoughts. My wife will be home for 2 weeks. I need that "running start."

I'm a .15 right now. By tomorrow, a .00, hopefully. Thank you all for rooting for me.

I wish I could tell you all my career change. Just not a good idea.
 
Thought you might want to see...
 

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Hi... don't want this to be all bad. I'm going to Phoenix next week for a job interview. The hotel I called has only suites, but they upgraded me to something better bc the room I had was taken.

1 out of a hundred isn't great, but it is something. :)

Anyone in life gets rain, but sometimes you get sunshine.
 
And, I have to say this.... I can't believe 11,000 people have read my stupid ramblings. I feel like a celebrity :)
 
So I just started a youtube channel about alcoholism. Mods... am I allowed to post a link here? Im not trying to make any money.
 
I'm proud of you , you took the first step...
Did you know AA is online during covid?
I am a child of an Alcoholic grew up in Alateen/alanon while my mom went to meetings.
 

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