Aspie Moms, what's the strangest phone call from school you've gotten?

[DisDreaminMom]

I just love these posts! I think if you'd ask my son, he would tell you that he'd rather have a five inch piece of wood impaled forever in his hand than have me pull it out with a tweezer. I have left large chunks of wood in his hand (he likes to run his hand on any kind of fence or railing, so I pray for metal and not natural wood- doesn't he get that it might give him a splinter?) because I didn't want to have to fight a kid almost as big as me that clearly wasn't as bothered by it as I was.

I have had people look at me like I am so mean, when I am only trying to follow DS's rules.

And does anyone notice that we can all name off our Aspie's "Rules". I can name some of our household rules;
1) No tags.
2) No scratchy clothes; nothing other than silky or cotton material.
3) No zippers or buttons.
4) No loud noises (unless DS makes them, and the louder the better).
5) No sitting too close to him, unless he choses to sit on top of you first.
6) No dogs can approach him, unless he choses to sit on top of them first.
7) No food eaten on anything other than the table unless it's on his tray with the picture facing him.
8) No kids can touch him, unless he choses to sit on top of them first.
9) No baths/showers unless he desperately wants one and you're too tired to help.
10) He lives in Paris, and will permanently move there when he turns 30. He will have 7 cats and 12 dogs. His house will have 23 stories but only eight rooms, and every room has a ceiling fan. He will have three pianos, and one room will be reserved for his sister when she visits him. When he is 59, he will be an astronaut (which is "really old). This is not funny.
11) He has to ask how old every adult he meets is, even if he asked them a few minutes ago.
12) He hates being HOT, thirsty, hungry, tired, annoyed, over-stimulated, under-stimulated, and when anyone watches any TV in the house on a channel he doesn't like.
13) He can steal his sister's toys but she can't touch his or he will die.
12) The best rule is "Just when you think you remember all the rules, they will change. There will be a test".

 

[BeckyScott]

Additional rules:

Every day for lunch there will be one hot dog, a small bag of chips, and two lemony wafer cookies in the lunchbox, along with a sports bottle of pear juice. On occasion, crackers can be substituted for the chips. Do not attempt to use any other flavor of juice, especially not one that is the same color as pear juice, that is a trick and will not be tolerated.

Every day upon arrival at home, if food is not presented within 30 seconds, starvation will occur.

All drinks in cups must be accompanied by a bendie straw.

All soda cans must have the tab pulled completely off.

For dinner there are only 4 options: cheesy noodles (gf pasta, margarine, soy parmesan) preferably the spiral Tinky's noodles; cheese pizza (from scratch of course); chicken nuggets; nachos (just chips and faux cheese). All chicken must be coated. These are four seperate meals and any attempt to combine foods will be rejected. Any attempt to "sneak" pureed vegetables into the food will be spotted immediately. Any attempt to make a pork roast look like chicken will result in the roast being accidentally dropped to the waiting dog. The foods must not touch. I found plastic school lunch trays at a rummage sale last summer and he wants the blue one, thank you very much.

 

[koolaidmoms]

Our additional rules:

There must be three meals and two snacks daily. It does not matter if it is called brunch it only counts as one meal. If at 8:00 pm all meals have not be presented one will be expected then IMMEDIATELY at the top of DS's lungs.

A declaration before every meal must be made by DS that he does not like what we are having even if he has eaten it 20 times before. It can be all ingredients he likes, rice, chicken and cheese but it is in casserole form and must not be liked.

If he is in a place where he must be quiet and sit still, he will not. If he is in a place where he can run and scream, he will sit on the bench and read a book.

All mistakes must be immediately corrected. When you are speaking you must be extremely accurate or the conversation will come to a complete stop to explain your inaccuracy.

Got to love them!

 

[happily single]

Hum, funny stories? No. But the former school has called protectice services on me a few times. Ds told then that my husband punched him 5 YEARS AGO. And the teacher still saw the bruise. So after an interrogation by protective services and an exam by the dr the school was not so kindly advised it is a cafe au lait spot. You couldn't possibly still be bruised after 5 years

But my dd did tell the preschool that I stuck ds in the oven once. I was cooking on an old electric stove with the coils and ds put his hand on the burner while I was taking something out of the oven. dd walked in as it all happened. I forgot to mention it to the teacher the next morning so they asked dd4 (at the time) who promptly informed them "mommy put Joe in the oven"

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Hey, it's the blue plate with the dogs on it (not the purple one). Also, the partitioned plates are good, but only the yellow one. Right there with you on the bendy straws. Newest one is that all foods that are served alone are to put in a yellow bowl.

He also eats with a sterling silver sugar "shell" spoon that has his name engraved on it. He liked one at my mother's house, so she got him a new one for his birthday last year (yes, he's 6). It's all he would eat with for a while (now forks are OK for things that require forks). I do have in my head a picture of my son as a fifty year old man sitting at a four star restaurant in Paris (remember, he's going to live there!) pushing aside the utensils from his table and pulling out his little nub of a sterling silver spoon to eat his haute cuisine.

I am having the best time reading these stories. You all have no idea how much better this makes me feel...

 

[mechurchlady]

Every day upon arrival at home, if food is not presented within 30 seconds, starvation will occur.

All drinks in cups must be accompanied by a bendie straw.

OMG that is my mother to a tee except it is canned pop must be with a straw.She knew today I was not up to speed but screamed LAURIE over and over again. She had to have food now or her sugars would crash. Every morning it is mild jack cheese chunk, sourdough toast, creamy Skippy peanut butter (preferably honey roasted), and Taster's Choice instant coffee with two pink packets and 3 spoonsful of canned milk. Never mind that we could afford other stuff, that is her routine. Can I trade you my mom for two of your kids, please, lol.

 

[buzz for boys]

My aspie son was counting money in school this week the teacher was amazed at how good he was without any real assistance. She decided she would tell him how wonderful it was that he had obviously worked out how to count money.
Ds replied yeah miss i have to be good at it *** my mom robs all my money for take outs !!!

Teacher was crying when she phoned me she had asked him if mom ever gives him the money back and he said No she puts it back where she robbed it from !!!
( they all keep it safe in their money boxes)
Another one this week - he has been on form this week!!
After been in school for nearly 2 hours and still only managing to put his name on the paper he proudly went up to the teacher and exclaimed that he had been busy thinking that morning -
Oh yes said the teacher what about ???
Ds replied - Im a bit of a dreamer !!!!

 

[kaffinito]

Our rules for the oldest boy (16)

1) No tags.
2) No scratchy clothes; nothing other than cotton material.
3) All tops must be black, brown or dark olive green. All pants must be cotton twill. NOTHING is to be other than very soft.
4) No sudden noises.
5) No sitting too close to him or touching him. Period.
6) No food can touch except for casseroles. This child will eat anything including alligator and escargot. He will try all foods at least three times to see if he likes them.
7) All food must be eaten WITH utensils
8) He has to use the bathroom everywhere he goes to "check it out"
9) He has to entertain babies everywhere we go, even if the babies or mothers do not want to be entertained.
10) He hates sunlight.
11) Every light in the house must be turned OFF at night. Even if you are still sitting in the room. No lights. We call him the "Prince of Darkness"


Our rules for the youngest boy (8)

1) Tags are ok
2) Clothes must be scratchy and uncomfortable. The more uncomfortable the fabric, the better. Wool shirts are awesome!
3) No coats other than leather jackets in the winter. No hats, gloves or scarves are to be worn. Forget about sweatshirts.
4) It is perfectly ok to wear three or four unrelated items of clothing in different sizes or colors at the same time. This resulted in John wearing a kilt with a Purple rayon flowered dress shirt and a pair of Crocs one day last summer.
5) He will sit on top of you whenever or wherever possible. He will hold your hand tightly when going anywhere.
6) He will touch anyone anywhere he chooses.
7) All food must be sorted out into its proper category before consumption. This includes stir fry's and casseroles. He will sort it all out before eating each individual pile of food.
8) All food must be eaten WITHOUT utensils. Especially chicken noodle soup.
9) Every light in the house must be turned ON at night. At all times. No exceptions.

Please note the completely separate sets of rules. Another reason for my "Fun with Autism!" saying...

 

[kaffinito]

Ok now for MY rules.

1) No tags on any clothing. Tag free underwear and bras have been a godsend for me!
2) Clothes must be cotton, soft linen or silk.
3) Clothes are allowed to be in colors other than Black, brown, beige or white now, but they must be in solid colors.
3b) Addendum to #3 Character t-shirts are ok at any time.
4) I must always order the same item at fast food restaurants. Ie. specific foods at Taco Bell, Burger King, etc
5) I cannot go anywhere unless I can pictures of what it looks like first. If there aren't enough photos on either Expedia or Trip Advisor, I won't be going there.
6) Only regular size M&M's can be eaten. Mini's are not acceptable. They are not "real." M&M's must be sorted according to color and then can only be eaten in groups of two. Three will not work. One is not good either. No mixing of colors is allowed except for orange and brown.

My DH adds to the list:
1) All of my sweatshirts and sweaters must be three sizes to big. If it fits me I won't wear it.
2) Unopened mail will be held in perpetuity until it biodegrades. I won't open mail unless I am really unsure as to what's in it.
3) Clothing unworn for a period of 6 months or more will be placed into a separate pile to be reevaluated in another 6 months, then sorted into another pile awaiting yet another reevaluation.

 

[DisDreaminMom]

We share the baby entertainment rule as well. Forgot about that one. And the sunlight thing is just amazing isn't it? I swear sometimes I think about going to the "hood" and buying a car that has been tinted in every window so DS won't scream every time a ray of light finds it's way though the windows of my car.

I wonder what life would be like with two completely normal kids? My sister has "normal"s and her son that is same age as mine is currently in a shoplifting "phase", so sometimes my troubles seem small. I swear her son will grow up and be in jail- he's such a little thug-very manipulative. My kid has rules and quirks, but he's just so damn sweet in his own funny way. Wouldn't trade him for the world....

 

[bookwormde]

OT My DS9 Aspergers is a “baby nut” also; you might think someone gave him a million dollars (not that he would care about $) if a baby comes into the room. He just thinks they are way to cute and magical, not to mention miraculous.

One of his past teacher is expecting and of course he has to walk up to her put his hand on her belly and ask “how’s it going in there”.

bookwormde

 

[BeckyScott]

Oldest DS is obsessed with wearing military camoflage. Fortunately, it's popular right now, so he doesn't look too out of place.

He got mad when everyone else started wearing it, insisting that they were copying "his style".

Every day, he wears camo pants and a t-shirt. Or camo shorts and a t-shirt in the summer. About half of his t-shirts are khaki or camo and he will wear them over and over. He also accessorizes this with a camo hat, camo jacket (one BDU jacket, one hoodie, depending on how cold it is), a dog tag, and a camo backpack. Unfortunately, none of them are the same camo. I tried to explain to him that it didn't look right to mix camo, and he looked at me like I was an idiot. After all, I was the one that bought it all, if I didn't want them mixed up I should have bought matching ones. I'll have to remember that for the future.

Thankfully he is big enough now to fit in a small men's pant. And thankfully, military surplus is cheap. I just have this flashback of (wasn't it?) Einstein that only owned black pants and white shirts... or Temple Grandin and those Western shirts...

 

[KirstenB]

Unfortunately our dd is so young, I don't have any stories to share yet. But I had to say how funny you guys are!!

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Just wait, you will...

 

[kaffinito]

We share the baby entertainment rule as well. Forgot about that one. And the sunlight thing is just amazing isn't it? I swear sometimes I think about going to the "hood" and buying a car that has been tinted in every window so DS won't scream every time a ray of light finds it's way though the windows of my car.

I wonder what life would be like with two completely normal kids? My sister has "normal"s and her son that is same age as mine is currently in a shoplifting "phase", so sometimes my troubles seem small. I swear her son will grow up and be in jail- he's such a little thug-very manipulative. My kid has rules and quirks, but he's just so damn sweet in his own funny way. Wouldn't trade him for the world....

I don't want "normal" kids. My oldest is a teenager, but not a typical teenager. I can leave him alone and not have to worry about wild parties or him bringing girls home. I've seen those normal kids, and their parents seem to have a lot of trouble with them when they become teens!

And the sunlight thing - LOL!!!

 

[BeckyScott]

There are advantages to kids that only see things as black-and-white. They make decisions based off of their knowledge and not peer pressure.

A couple of weeks ago my son was at a friend's house, and there was an older child there, a teenager DS says. The teenager decided it would be fun to play the choking game. Seriously.

DS told him he was an ____ (insert cuss word he shouldn't be using but was an appropriate definition), immediately called us to come pick him up, and told us what happened.

It was the first time that I know of where DS had someone else try to use peer pressure to do something really stupid. And he did exactly what he should have done. Because it's a black-and-white issue for him, that's bad and no matter what anyone says he won't change his mind.

 

[kaffinito]

There are advantages to kids that only see things as black-and-white. They make decisions based off of their knowledge and not peer pressure.

A couple of weeks ago my son was at a friend's house, and there was an older child there, a teenager DS says. The teenager decided it would be fun to play the choking game. Seriously.

DS told him he was an ____ (insert cuss word he shouldn't be using but was an appropriate definition), immediately called us to come pick him up, and told us what happened.

It was the first time that I know of where DS had someone else try to use peer pressure to do something really stupid. And he did exactly what he should have done. Because it's a black-and-white issue for him, that's bad and no matter what anyone says he won't change his mind.

Bravo for him! That's great that he won't give in to peer pressure!

 

[DisDreaminMom]

Wow, that's incredible! Good for your son! When I lived in FL, even the 4th graders at my DD's magnet school got caught playing it, and it totally freaked everyone out. I think one kid had to be hospitalized, though even that is very lucky. I think you should be super proud of your kid.

Happy Turkey Day, everyone.

 

[Dawson'sMom]

Hi everyone! I am so glad that I found this thread! I have a DS9 with AS. This is great therpy for me! I just got to tell you about Thanksgiving w/ my Mom. Everyone was there and my DN3 and DS9 were being overly active. My Mom told them to quit acting like wild indians. DS9 stated that he was an indian that he was a boy.

 

[irish dancer]

I just love reading all these stories, I see my DS8 in so many of them. Well I got an unnecessary phone call from school earlier.

Teacher: "Hi, I'm wondering if you can help me figure out your son today"

Me: "Okaayyy.....what's up"

Teacher: "Well, he is acting so tired. He is putting his head on his desk, he didn't want to go to the library to look at the Germany map (studying Christmas around the world) and he was even line leader, etc"

Me: "Well, he was fine when I dropped him off. He was very excited and played out in the snow while waiting for the bus (that didn't come)"

Teacher: "He says he got up at 4:30am"

Me: "Yes, he was up at 4am (we're having sleep problems) but I put him back to bed"

Teacher: "Did he go back to sleep?"

Me: "I don't know, I did"

Teacher: "Well, OK I thought I'd check if something was up. Maybe he's getting sick"



Did that really require a phone call home? Probably not. He is most likely sleep deprived but what am I supposed to do? I can't make him sleep. I can't imagine he's the first kid she's encountered that was tired at school.