Hi there! Your first question is actually something I ask myself multiple times a day. I personally don't believe in "boy" things or "girl" things but at the same time I don't want a boy to be embarrassed or upset when he looks at his photo and sees Tinkerbell. I feel that most magic shots are more girl centered (Tink, wings, butterflies). The Simba shots can be challenging also since it is a male character but to do the pose correctly they have to look like they are holding a doll or a baby. Generally, I do the same poses for all kids 8ish or under since at that age Tink and Simba can still be cool. There is also the single butterfly shot which is easy for younger kids so I hope the parents think it's cute, boy or girl. Generally everyone likes the Chip ones. If I see a pre-teen or teen boy I will generally do one of the Stitch shots or the balloons. The new Jiminy Cricket shot it also good for boys. It all depends on the location and the photographer. If you ask specifically for it and we are in a location where that shot is approved we can definitely do it for you. Just say please!
Question 2: As soon as you get off the ride you will see your photo and the station where the photo can be added. Just make sure to mention that you have MM if you have it. If you do not have magic bands make sure to have the MM card with you. If not, you can purchase a download or print. It depends on the day and time but from my understanding the lines are never too horrible. If you bought MM make sure to get it since you already paid for it.
As another note, make sure you get the photo as soon as you get off the ride. Please don't come up to us at the photopass view stations in the front of the park. The attractions photos and the photopass photos work on two different systems so the only thing we can do is send you back to the attraction.
Here is a list of the attractions with photos:
MK: Buzz Lightyear, Splash Mountain, Space Mountain
Epcot: Test Track
Studios: Tower of Terror, Rockin Roller Coaster
AK: Expedition Everest, Dinosaur
Hope that helps!