How old should children be to be left alone?

[Mississippian]

First of all, I've found that this type of question can cause a flame war. Please respect other posters if you have something to say.

I remember as a child I was allowed to walk up town on my own at age 7, and it was a young 7. I'm fairly certain I was left at home by myself at this age for short periods. This wasn't because my parents were bad parents. It was the societal norm. In fact, public school buses at that time were not allowed to transport any child who lived within one mile of the school, regardless of grade. A first-grader was presumed able to walk to school on his or her own. Children were just assumed to be able to do things on their own without hovering parents.

One of the reasons I remember my exact age is that my mother usually took me to school and picked me up, but one day she told me that I would have to walk home from school. I was just a few months past my seventh birthday. I remember wailing that I was scared to walk home, that I just couldn't, and her explaining that it was only three blocks further than the town square where I walked every Saturday.

I'm not sure times have change as much as people think they have. But news coverage certainly has, and we are certainly a more protective society.

So my question is, how old do you think a child or two children of like age should be before they are left alone in a room at a DVC resort while their parents are elsewhere at the same resort?

How old do you think a child or two children of like age should be before they are left alone in a room at a DVC resort while their parents are elsewhere at WDW?

We are assuming obedient children with a cell phone who presumably will stay in the room if instructed to do so, and not roam the resort. Also, DVC is specified because there is less coming and going in the hallways of DVC resorts than the hotel resorts.

Just curious about your views. I'm sure they are varied.

 

[disney-super-mom]

That's a very tough question and one which obviously is going to have a huge variance in answers.

The Florida Red Cross offers babysitting and childcare classes for kids 11-15, so I guess if the Red Cross thinks 11 years of age is old enough to babysit, then that might be a good age to possibly consider leaving unsupervised for a short period, maybe a couple of hours, depending on the maturity level and trustworthiness.

I'm a bit more overprotective myself though, and with my own kids, would wait until they're 13 or 14 before leaving them unsupervised while on vacation for a couple of hours.

I still remember being a kid.....and all the stupid things we did when left unsupervised, so I know how even 'good kids' (like myself) can get into mischief. Ah.....good times.....good times!

 

[epicureangirl]

I have a 2 and a 10 year old, and will wait until my eldest is 12 before leaving her in charge. Basically, whatever the legal age in your area is for a child to babysit... that's what I'd go by, but only if you consider them responsible. I am at a resort right now (kids asleep) and am very tempted to slip out for a swim, but it only takes a minute for something to go wrong and then I would NEVER forgive myself. So, in my opinion, even if you are in the same resort, if something were to go really wrong you would probably not be available to help them as quickly as you would need to. Think of the confusion that might happen even if someone pulled the fire alarm... how do you think they would handle it and where would they be?

I think it's easy to be relaxed, especially on vacation, but if I want a few hours out, I'd rather leave a babysitting service in charge (pay the money) and feel really relaxed. I consider myself a pretty easy-going parent, but I sure have seen my 10 year old use some very poor judgement, and she is a really good kid.

 

[BroganMc]

Call me paranoid but I'm not comfortable leaving pre-teens alone (under 12s), more so if they are in charge of younger children. There are just too many predators out in the world waiting for a kid alone. And children, despite many warnings to the contrary, are very trusting.

By 13 I'd start re-evaluating based on the child's maturity and what sort of responsibility they are given. It's very different leaving an older sibling in charge at home and putting them in charge in a strange location.

I myself was left alone at home for a few hours in the evenings from the age of 9. It was out of necessity for my mom had to leave for work and my dad (and older teen siblings) weren't home yet. I was absolutely terrified at first and only grudgingly got used to it with time. I wasn't entirely comfortable being on my own until I was 12-13.

 

[lisareniff]

I was tempted last spring when we were staying at VWL to have my older daugher (Just turned 11) watch my younger one (5) while we went to Artist point. I could have gone either way on that one. She will watch her at home when I have to run errands in our small village or a meeting, but usually not at night or for more then an hour and a half. I would not have left the resort or been more then 5 minutes away. In the end we had too much to do to fit in that quiet dinner for two! It was probably the better choice.

So I think 10-11ish is OK as long as the child is comfortable (as well as you) along with having a cell phone and being within the resort. I'm not sure of the next question, what age to allow them to be alone while in other parts of WDW. It can take a long time to get from one place to another in WDW. Eating in Epcot while staying at BCV is one thing but eating at Jiko while staying at VWL is another. Since I don't have children of that age yet I'll have to pass on answering that question. It will be a while for our comfort level. Maybe 15?

 

[jimmytammy]

If there are 2 kids, then around 13-14 IMO. Our DD is very responsible at 14 but DS is very inquisitive at 13. We had a situation just the other day that warranted him not to be left alone til he gains more trust.

The last 2 trips to WDW, we have let the kids stay by themselves in the room for a couple hrs. DD has a cell so she can call or vice versa to keep in touch, so that helps.

I am like you in that I would be home at a young age by myself for a couple hrs. but not everyday.

 

[WendyinNC]

My daughter is 11 and completed the red cross babysitting course. She has been a girl scout for 6 years. I will now leave her with my DD9 and DS7 for short periods of time, but not if she is asleep. Although she helps out a lot with DS20 months, I will not leave her to watch him unless he is asleep since he gets into everything.

 

[Mississippian]

So I think 10-11ish is OK as long as the child is comfortable (as well as you) along with having a cell phone and being within the resort. I'm not sure of the next question, what age to allow them to be alone while in other parts of WDW. It can take a long time to get from one place to another in WDW. Eating in Epcot while staying at BCV is one thing but eating at Jiko while staying at VWL is another. Since I don't have children of that age yet I'll have to pass on answering that question. It will be a while for our comfort level. Maybe 15?

My guess is that a lot of people would say 15 on this. This is an age where I had a driver's license, car and could pretty much go wherever I pleased, although I think I had to be 15-and-a-half before I could drive into Memphis.

My children are soon-to-be 9 and 8 and I've only left them alone to dash down to the sundry shop to get a newspaper in the morning. But it does seem at some point soon we ought to be able to go downstairs for dinner while they watch TV upstairs.

They tend to be obedient children, and it makes a big difference, because I don't really worry about them getting into trouble. But my guess it is that it will be another year before we can do without a baby sitter.

 

[goofy4tink]

It's funny but we had an 11 y/o babysit for my dd when she was about 4...figured the young lady was plenty old enough. But, when my dd got to be 11, there was no way she was old enough to babysit!
When another mom and I took our two dd's to WDW to celebrate their 13th birthdays last Oct, the girls were allowed to go off on their own. My dd is very familiar with the parks so I had no problem with that at all. One night, as we returned from DTD, we got off the bus at BC, and then walked over to Epcot for FandW...but the girls wanted to work on homework, so they headed over to BW to the villa. The other mother was a bit nervous about letting them go back to the room alone and then be there by themselves. We were in contact with the girls via our cell phones. They were just fine...in fact they had a grand time by themselves. I would think it would depend on the child's maturity level as well as the parental comfort level.

 

[lisareniff]

My children are soon-to-be 9 and 8 and I've only left them alone to dash down to the sundry shop to get a newspaper in the morning. But it does seem at some point soon we ought to be able to go downstairs for dinner while they watch TV upstairs.

They tend to be obedient children, and it makes a big difference, because I don't really worry about them getting into trouble. But my guess it is that it will be another year before we can do without a baby sitter.

I think if you start leaving them home for the same period of time and they do fine, then at that age and with the modern technology of cel phones, leaving them in the villa and staying in the same resort should be just fine. One part is the general safety of the children. The other is how well they do together. The babysitter I use (really only 2-3 times a year!) for longer times and nights is 15 but she can not watch her sister (10) because they do not get along when left alone.

 

[tomandrobin]

Here you can legally leave a child home is 8 years old. They can babysit at age 12. That being said, I have no problem with our 14 and 16 year old babysitting other kids. I have no problem leaving one of them home for a few hours at a time. But there is no way I can leave both of them home together for an extended period of time. Everytime we have in the past, trouble always seems to "happen".

 

[MJS]

21 +

 

[salmoneous]

You can't put an age on such a questio. There are 8-year-olds who would be fine, and 15-year-olds who wouldn't. It depends upon the kid.

I would say that if (1) the child is an experienced traveler and is familiar with hotel/DVC rooms and (2) you would leave them alone in their home, then it's OK to leave them alone at DVC.

 

[crisi]

You can't put an age on such a questio. There are 8-year-olds who would be fine, and 15-year-olds who wouldn't. It depends upon the kid.

I would say that if (1) the child is an experienced traveler and is familiar with hotel/DVC rooms and (2) you would leave them alone in their home, then it's OK to leave them alone at DVC.

Yep, and when you are adding children, then you add the variable of the dynamics between the kids.

My daughter is eight, my son is nine, and we will leave them alone for short periods - like running up to school for parent night. They are pretty responsible kids who generally follow rules - and TV and a snack keeps them out of trouble for an hour.

I don't think I'd leave them alone at DVC yet - they know "house rules" but still sometimes get weird ideas in their head about rules being different in different places (which, honestly, they are - they get more snacks and treats on vacation) and I'm not sure it wouldn't occur to them that wandering out on the balcony and standing on the chair to see better was a bad idea.

 

[sixcats]

When our son was 14 we felt comfortable leaving him with his sisters, then 10 and 6 while we had a glass of wine or shopped in the same resort. They were 16, 11 and 8 when we actually left the resort for Pleasure Island early one evening.

Within the hour the youngest got sick with a stomach bug and we were headed back. They really proved that they were responsible. By the time we got there she was showered, in clean clothes and they had cleaned up the considerable mess.

My daughter is a mature 12, I would feel comfortable leaving her at a resort while I went to the ice machine or giftshop as long as we both had cell phones.

They actually look forward to a few hours with a room service dinner and a DVD alone each trip while we have dinner nearby.

 

[burrow4]

We started leaving our son in the room with pizza and the tv when he was 14 years old. We would go to one of the signature restaurants and enjoy a long dinner; something he had no interest in doing. We had cell phones on and he knew not to let anyone in the room; including housekeeping. He's a pretty mature kid and we could have probably started this when he was 12, but I'm a little overprotective.

 

[mello]

We've been thinking about that as well. We tend toward the protective side with our teen and tween (dh works in law enforcement and tends toward a pessimistic view on these things - he would say that society most definitely continues to change for the worse in terms of types of crimes, number of crimes, and people's attitude toward laws and law enforcement). Anywhoo, we're thinking of an adults only evening at PI on our next trip, and we're thinking the older two (11 and 14) will be just fine in the villa watching movies and eating pizza. We feel they can be trusted not to go out or open the door to anyone. We're debating whether or not to leave our younger dd with them. They deal well with her at home for an evening, but preschoolers can be unpredictable, and even though it's "home away from home", it isn't really home, so we're thinking the best thing would be to put her in one of the kids' clubs while the older two are on their own. We also plan on letting the older two go off on their own some while at the parks (with us in the same park and everyone in posession of cell phones).

Should add that it really does depend upon the maturity of the kids. In our case, 11yo ds is actually the more responsible, level-headed and forward-thinking of the two, but 14yo ds has physical size, experience and knowledge (years of boy scouts) that the younger one doesn't, so we feel it's a good combination.

 

[springandmac]

When we were at OKW we let DD13 and her Best Friend (also 13) go to the pool and Hank's by themselves. (We were at the resort too). DD is normally so responsible and mature but we did have two minor incidents.

The first incident DD called me from her cell phone, sobbing. Talk about heart failure, she then made me promise I wouldn't get mad. I agreed not to just so she'd get on with the story, then she broke the news that they accidentally got on the wrong bus and ended up at Animal Kingdom, which turned out to be much better than the 1000 different scenarios that my mind was racing through while I listened to her cry. The second incident was they told us they were going to Hank's and when my husband went up there to check on his son (a 12 year old who will probably never be left alone....way too imature) they weren't there. DH heads back to the room and crosses pathes with me on my way to HH, he asked if the kids were at the room I told him no, his son came in and put his swim trunks on but I thought that he and DH were going swimming. So we went over to the quiet pool and there they were. After giving them the what-for we didn't have anymore problems with them.

She told me the other day that her favorite part of our vacation was being allowed to go to the pool, HH and Hank's without parental supervision.

 

[paulh]

in the uk its againt the law to leave a child home alone under the age of 14.You might have read a lot of reports about the Maccans who left there 3 children alone in portugal while they went for a meal.One went missing,what happend is subject to congeture,but a lot of people think they should at least be prosicuted for leving them unatended
Paulh

 

[lovinthemouse]

I think it comes down to maturity level. Some kids are very responsible at 10 and 11 and some not until they are older. Each kid has to be judged individually. I don't think you can lump them all together and come up with a pat answer.