How old should children be to be left alone?

[edk35]

In the state of MD you can be a latch key kid at age 8. You can't babysit until you are 13 even for your siblings. My middle son was in 6th grade before I let him come home by himself from school. I woudn't personally feel comfortable leaving young kids at a resort but if there was an older siblling like 15 or older I might. My dd is almost 17 and we still all go everywhere together at WDW. I mean sure they will go off and ride something or my almost 14 year old will but I will not let my 8 year do that without one of them.

 

[OlderMan]

I joke with my DD's (9 & 10) that there are things that they can't do until they're 40....

That said, they are mature for their ages and I don't mind leaving them alone for an hour or so. (They actually seem to be better with each other when neither DW nor I are around!)

When we're at OKW, if DW and I want to go out in the evening--usually just to The Gurgling Suitcase--I have no problem leaving them alone in our suite. The usually watch a DVD or Disney Channel on TV.

They know not to let ANYONE in and we always leave a cell phone with them should they need to get in touch with us.

To date, no problems......

 

[pcparamedics01]

I believe it always depend on the maturity of the child. He/she has to prove she is responsible to stay alone. I am thinking 14.

 

[deej696]

I also think it depends on the kids involved. My parents must have thought I was pretty responsible because my brother and I were allowed to go to the parks by ourselves when I was 12 and he was 8. Granted, we had grown up at Disney and knew it better than our own hometown, as my dad played in the pro-am at the Walt Disney Golf Classic every year. But looking back, I am kinda amazed that at 12 and 8 we navigated the monorail, and spent the day hopping between parks. Not so sure my kids will be doing the same at that age...

 

[LadyTrampScamp&Angel]

My kids are 7 and 11. Although they are good kids and manage to follow the rules most of the time I still would not feel comfortable leaving them alone. They still make errors in judgement at times that give me pause, I don't think either is mature enough to be left alone at home much less WDW. Maybe around 12-14 at home, I don't think I'd do it at 12, even 13 when away from home, probably wait till more like 14-15. If nothing went wrong they'd probably be fine but I worry about if something unusual did happen.

Hotels cause me concern because kids just walking alone in hallways could easily be pulled into a room without anyone else noticing. I know I'm protective but right now it just doesn't feel right.

I was a latchkey kid and was left alone at home with my younger siblings when I was 10, they would have been 7 and 5. While we survived I managed to destroy a few things, get in a bit at trouble at times. Don't think I want to go there with my own kids.

 

[paulh]

As for the McCanns, it's a completely different scenario - their kids were only tiny (all toddlers) and should never have been left alone. I believe what people are talking about here are teenagers.



The legal age for drinking alcohol here in the UK is 18 - there are no exceptions to this, although I do know that some publicans years ago were perhaps not as strict about the law as others but not so much now.

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As for the Macanns i dident what to go into the simatics of the case as its a hotley discused topic in uk.
As OP wanted to know what age to leave alone some people might think its ok to leave todders alone like the macanns did

As for the legal age for alcohol right for beer and sprits but for Cider age is 16
Will check with MIL(used to be a publican)
Paulh
ETA
In bars and off-licensed premises the MDA and MPA are 18. The MPA for
beer and cider is 16 when purchased for consumption with meals
(except when in a bar). Children over five may consume alcoholic
beverages at home with their parent's consent.

 

[veenstra56]

It certainly depends on how mature and responsible the kids are.

My girls are 13 and 9, and at this point I honestly would feel more guilty than nervous about leaving them alone while we went to dinner (although it would make me nervous,too). When we take the kids to WDW we do everything together, and when my wife and I want to be alone, we take a seperate trip just for that.

It's a difficult topic because there are so many variables. In the end it really depends on the situation.

 

[tubtruck]

Its no way near as strict in the UK for purchasing alcohol as in florida. I was asked for ID last year in Forida and I am 32, I found this quite amusing. I have never ever been asked for ID in the UK since I was 18 and I regularily used to purchase alcohol in pubs and bars when I was younger without any problems, even these days kids especially girls often go out to the pub and have no problem getting served at only 15,16 or 17 years old. There used to be shop near my home that happily served anyone, I remeber my friends 10 year old brother managing to buy beer from there. Plenty of school kids smoke over here as well, noticably more than in the US and until october this year it is perfectly legal for anyone over 16 years of age to buy and smoke them. I wonder how many of US parents would be happy with your 16 year olds smoking?

 

[DVCJones]

I remember my parents leaving us alone at night while they went out to eat or something. We were young too. There were four of us and we ranged in age to 5-12. We were very low key children and everything went well. We had great neighbors who we knew we could go to in an emergency. Also my grandmother and uncle lived down the street too.

It also wouldn't be uncommon of my parent to go on vacation for a week and leave my 17yo brother in charge. Again, my neighbor and my grandmother were informed and checked in on us. When I think back on this, I think this is CRAZY!!!! The weird thing is, we were always behaved, went to school, did homework, ate dinner and went to bed. We didn't fight and never told anyone we were alone. We were very responsible "kids". Thats not to say accidents couldn't have happened. If they did, I wonder what we would have done.

As a parent of two, I think my parents were nuts to do all of the above

At this rate I don't think I will be leaving my children alone for many many years. I am a known worry wort.

 

[Sammie]

Hotels cause me concern because kids just walking alone in hallways could easily be pulled into a room without anyone else noticing. I know I'm protective but right now it just doesn't feel right

Your concern is justified. Most of the crime at Disney occurs at the resorts. Definitely the drug deals are mostly confined to rooms at resorts.

 

[twotoohappy]

I read somewhere that the legal age in Florida is 12years.

My opinion, if you're in the same building/resort and within a 3 min.
run to the room, child is use to being alone, has cel phone, etc. AND if the child is mature, then you could go a little younger.

When in doubt, go with the childcare centers (up to age 12) or fairy god mothers service would give you peace of mind and have somebody for your child to play with

as far as going to further places on WDW property, geesh, I'd say 18.
but, I'd just take them with me

 

[Judique]

Here you can legally leave a child home is 8 years old. They can babysit at age 12. That being said, I have no problem with our 14 and 16 year old babysitting other kids. I have no problem leaving one of them home for a few hours at a time. But there is no way I can leave both of them home together for an extended period of time. Everytime we have in the past, trouble always seems to "happen".

Maryland and Illinois are the only two states with actual laws on the books covering this subject. The legal age is 8 to be left alone in Md and age 13 to babysit.

On the other hand, there are many sets of guidelines set up by various child welfare departments in different states which address ages, length of time left alone, conditions, time of day or night and whether the child can contact for help.

In my job I deal with this issue almost on a daily basis. Parents expect amazing levels of supervision from school professionals, but - suddenly - when they are back in mom and dads care - they are to be considered mature enough to be left alone.

For myself and my child - At age 12-13, brief separations inside the parks - go for fastpasses, ride a ride alone, meet up at exit. At resorts, go for food to the Bakery, ESPN, etc. Wait in room while I do short errands - 1 hour or less.
Mostly we stay together - she's now 15 and is very responsible, but has not asked to go to a park alone. I doubt she would want to. Who would buy all those expensive souvies? She'll be driving soon - yiii!

Seems to me it's basically a parental decision in most states until something gets screwed up and you end up being charged with neglect, so use good judgement. More then likely if you have it, so does your child - the apple does not fall far from the tree.

 

[LadyTrampScamp&Angel]

Your concern is justified. Most of the crime at Disney occurs at the resorts. Definitely the drug deals are mostly confined to rooms at resorts.

Yikes, I hadn't even thought about drug deals. I do think that bad things can happen when a bad person meets up with a good opportunity. I know it's not likely, but still.

This just happened a few days ago to a local 11 year old girl who was home alone, and I thought of this thread. This story is tragic so I'm posting a link instead of the story, so if you don't want to read it, it's not right in front of you.

http://www.wral.com/news/local/story/1847871/

I'm not criticizing those who leave their kids alone, I'm saying this is the kind of thing that worries me - that something not normal might happen.

 

[loribell]

I have not read this whole thread, and really don't have an opinion on the matter. I did want to post though to let everyone know about an experience we had this summer.

As we were packing up to head home my dh, ds-15 and myself had all taken a load to the car. Not even thinking about it, we left my 8 yo dd in the room. We had all left at different times and she would have been in there alone for just a minute. DH came back around the corner just after I had left the room and there was a male CM with a door key getting ready to open our door.

He told dh that he was with bell services and they had gotten new keys that morning so he was checking random rooms just to be sure they worked. Of course this scared me to death. It was our last load, we got our daughter and headed out and then called the resort to check it out. DH had his name and they immediately called to verify that he was supposed to have been in there. Even they were concerned. The story checked out and everything was fine but the thought of what could have happened in that short amount of time is very frightening.

So just a warning to be careful. If your children are going to be in the room alone, regardless of age let them know to keep the safety latches locked and to never open the door for anyone.

 

[roadtripper]

At Disney, or in "real life"?

We left our two-weeks-from-13-years-old, Red Cross trained DD at BWV with our DS11 this past August. We brought pizza back to the room, and DH and I went to Flying Fish for a grownup dinner. It was heavenly.

In the interest of full disclosure, High School Musical 2 was on the Disney Channel, and I knew nothing would tear her away from the room.
DS has several disabilities, so it is tough for us to even consider going out, but they had a blast without us.

In "real life" we don't get out much...

 

[gopherit]

Color me as one of those who would probably give my kids more "leash" at home than ANYWHERE else (including Disney). At home, I know exactly what's around them, and similarly, they know where/who they can call upon for help. There's nothing to really entice them otherwise - no pool or gameroom calling their name, nothing to "check out... just for a minute!" that they haven't already seen, LOL. As for vacation places, well, frankly, that's the VERY time I'm trying to spend WITH them, so chances are, I would be miffed if they decided they preferred to go their own way or just hang out in the room alone, LOL! DH and I figure we have but a short time when these guys actually WANT to hang out with Mom and Dad- why rush past it? We have our senior years to traipse off to Disney "solo" - so for now, it's family time, whether ya like it or not!! That said, I think if my child were not feeling great or wanted to head back to the room to get a jump on the showers or grab a snack or wanted to go check the gift shop or sit at the bus stop ahead of us - I am fine with that so long as they know their way around and have a means to contact us. We often play a game w/ our boys where we let them decide how we get from point "A" to point "B". We watch their decision process and it's interesting to see how well they can navigate with no instruction for us, even in brand-new places. But even somewhere as familiar as WDW, I am WAY more comfy loosening reins at day than night - I don't think I'll be able to do THAT until they are at least 21, LOL! It's too darn hard to locate people amongst all the crowds, and who wants to spend their vacation trying to hunt someone down? The family that plays together, stays together... (and makes it to their ADR's on time! )

We have begun letting our "DSalmost13" and/or DS11 stay at home for short spurts of time (an hour or two at best). During those times, DH or I are never more than a 5 minute drive away, and we know adult neighbors are home. If DH and I want to go out, however, we still get a babysitter, but our babysitters are typically age 15 and up. Our DS12 has begun to balk about this, so we are usually sensitive to that and only plan such nights when he's off on a Scout camping trip or at a friend's for the night. I don't leave my sons in charge of their sister (age 7) because they simply aren't mature enough to realize the magnitude of that job. They do really well taking care of themselves, and I make sure to only leave them on their own when they are in a state best able to handle it, but adding someone else - an unpredictable, even less mature someone else - to their responsibilities would be too much. I guess it's also because I feel they're my kids - not my kids' kids - so it's my job to parent them. If anything happened, I'd have not only my guilt, but the guilt felt by my "kid left in charge" to reckon with. I'm just overprotective and control-freakish that way... As I tell my DS11 when he tries to correct his sister or boss his brother - "Hey - that's MY job. If you would like the position of Mom, turn in your application, but I'm warning you - you have to assume the WHOLE job, not just the parts you want. Trust me- the pay isn't so hot and the fun can be grossly overrated at times!" Besides, I always hated it when my older sisters baby-sat me, so maybe that's part of my decision factor, too.

Kids don't always understand how the rules can "change" from kid to kid, either. We let DS12 stay home alone one day for a few hours because he had pink eye. We knew he was too self-conscious to go anywhere - he just wanted to lay on the couch. Very low risk. So DS11 says, "Ok, when do I get to stay home alone?" He looked at it as this HUGE event, a milestone in his life, and began planning all the "grand things" he would do if he were home alone - like, watching endless TV, play gamecube til his thumbs fell off, eating snacks, basically reveling in a house all to himself and without his sister in it, LOL. So along comes the day when he has a sprained ankle, and since the dr. appt is mid-morning, we let him stay home for 2 hours while DH and I go to work. Suddenly, it didn't seem like such a treat to DS, LOL, just more like a relief, like, ok, good, I don't have to climb the stairs at school, I can stay here til Mom comes to get me, give me some Tylenol and a pillow and can I take a nap?

ANYWAY - It's as everyone else before me has said: the decision on when/how long/where to give a child "freedom" depends on each and every child, in his / her own good time, based on the conditions laid before them, as assessed by the parents who raised them. What's right for gophers may well be too strict for some, too lenient for another, and heck, even AMONGST gophers, the rules can change from pup to pup!! :yes:

 

[KelNottAt]

My kids were 10 and 12 when we left them alone in the hotel room watching movies while we went to a nice "grown up" dinner in the lobby restaurant. It was a HUGE resort (not WDW), with cell phones on us, we were comfortable doing this.

We had given them both the "stanger danger" talk so many times that they could recite in their sleep, practically. The flaw in our plan, however, was forgetting to talk about hotel evacuations. Yup, you guessed it. There was a fire. Not a drill, a real FIRE. It rang on their floor (10th) and adjacent floors, but not in the lobby. Did the kids evac? No. They covered their heads with pillows and cursed the loud alarm. Thank goodness our nieces (a few rooms away) came for them.

Did they try to call us? No. I only found out about the fire when I discovered them returning to the room with security. The whole experience ranks right up there as one of the biggest regrets of my motherhood.

In hindsight, we'd do a lot different. Most importantly, not assume "home alone" age and "hotel alone" age are the same thing.

In the state of MD you ...can't babysit until you are 13 even for your siblings.

I didn't know that. I had heard that it was age 11 for watching school-aged sibs. But, that's based on nothing official. I believe you.

 

[vwlvette]

Just follow this general rule, "leave with as many kids as you arrived with!" just kidding, this year the kids going with us are 9, 10, 12, 14, 72 & 11months!
All are seasoned Disney Vets, well except our little 11 month old princess (there goes the early retirement!) They all have Cell phones, All know Disney World inside and out. We let them go off on their own for short periods of time, as long as there are at least 2 together. We have had no issues at all.
All are boys and for some crazy reason all are very responsible, not really sure how this was accomplished. Although I have to say they all love to hang out as a family (including extended family) and do the parks, DTD and meals together. They are all counting down towards our next trip, in 41 days!

 

[DisneyBride'03]

Hey, I love how you through in the 72 year old kid!!!

Have a great time!!

 

[BrentKohl]

Four years old...as long as you eat at a nearby restaurant and check up on the child every 30 minutes or so. Or at least that's how things work if you're in Portugal.